WHAT MAKES US HAPPY?
I wrote the aforementioned article back in the June’s beginning — the times have progressed — so here’s some QnA type of overview
Did I get what I wanted? — No
Did I tried to get it? — Yes
Was it worth it? — I don’t know
Can I do anything about it? — No, out of my control now I guess
Do I still want it? — I don’t know
Am I happy? — NO!
Will I ever be happy about it? — I don’t know
Am I peace with myself? — Not now, but however hard it is I’ll be OK!
So what really is happiness?, what really makes us happy. Today a friend of mine said that “life is going just like it should” and I know for sure she was happy — she’s not one of the person who would hide her happiness. So she was happy because life is going the right way.
It really made me think does our happiness corresponds to our expectations. That’s why people say learn to expect less – you’ll be more happy. I expected a set marks in my exams and getting 5% more than it was really a “head over heels” moment for me.
But do we always keep our expectations low – NO. I for example try so hard but still am unable to keep my expectations low. But being a loser on the flipside has its long term perks – as much as your expectations are not met – you start to fall to the pessimistic side. I don’t know if that’s good or not – losing hope that it. But it teaches us one precious thing “caution” – it’s good to go out of the way and expect the unexpected but it mostly makes us sad when that are not met.
Also the Monk’s ideology also tells to keep as less as things as attachment and it would make us more happy.
So high hopes are really shown as the way to success but they break our heart most of the times. The agony of not getting it – you can’t predict the future ever you can only hope for it.
So this is the real code of happiness I’ve found
- Hope less
- Trust less
- Have lower expectations
- Be colder towards emotions
Then see how your expectations for life falls and how you’ll be happy is less – because most of the things will inevitably fall your way and your way will be the one that’s most probable because you’re not hoping much.