Monster

What is this monster waiting to gobble up my girls?

With her tummy bunched up in her hands, my very thin 9 year old girl tells my very fit 11 year old girl that she’s fat. My 11 year old girl says no, dad says I’m way chubbier.

And he does. He tells them that they’re fat all of the time. Me too. And we are a thin family but we are not Thinspo thin. This is what disgusts him.

Imagine leaving them alone with him every other week. If he doesn’t kill them in a car wreck (which he already almost did) he will completely kill their souls.

I’m their airbag against him. The only person to save them.

If he isn’t telling them they’re fat, he’s telling them that they’re stupid, stupid, stupid, & disappointing. My 9 year old is already cutting herself. She has horrible anxiety. My 11 year old has all but lost her spark.

He wants them to be fabulous so *he* looks good. I don’t really think he cares what they feel. He jams his finger up to his knuckle in his huge potato bulb of a nose, and drives around like that. He barks orders, and I mean bark. He can’t talk. If he speaks at all it’s to criticize everyone, and to compliment himself.

So. Here I am.

All I can think to do is be the best I can be, and make the world a better place. And hopefully Asa & Maya follow suit.

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