Recovery

Success

I have been thinking this week about my long lasting friendship with my best friend Courtney. And have thought about how we have had both our shares of hardships/hard times together throughout the 15 years we’ve known each other. Which have been challenging for the both of us but managed to get through them together stronger somehow and with time.

It’s hard not to use our emotions when going through hardships with people we know like best friends and other acquaintances. When we had our first hardship I believe while in the 2nd semester of college last year, it was hard for the both of us. I was using more emotion rather than logic.

It was hard. Your emotions sometimes gets the best of you, but not entirely a bad way. But through that time, I eventually came to realise that I made it out stronger and same with Courtney.

Having support and help from my previous counsellor (Pauline) on campus in college last year was really someone I really did appreciate not just for help and support for my mental health but also for my hardships with my best friend Courtney. And also appreciate my help and support from everyone else for my academics as well. The classmates, learning skills, Brenda, tutor, Agnes and everyone else on campus, on residence, close friends and all you happiers here on Happier as well.

Being in recovery for as long as I have been (April 24th 2015 – present), you’re gonna definitely learn, gain a lot of new knowledge, insights, experiences, lessons and everything in between. It’s also important not only to be proud of yourself for them, but be grateful and appreciative of them.

Through all that I’ve been through in my recovery chapter so far, I’ve really come to realise all the things I’ve accomplished in the amount of time I’ve been in recovery. Even through my first relapse with my depression and same with my nail picking habit.

My nails were looking healthier than they’ve ever been since I started using my new and successful method to help me get out of the bad habit. (used these nail treatments below). They looked so long (longer than they’ve ever been) and the weekend of my cousin’s birthday bbq, I found myself with the urge again and went at my nails again. By the end of the night, I found them looking not as healthy, only making them look and feel unhealthy and in pain. And also having constant thoughts and that night being the main focus of how fast it happened. And all of a sudden, they weren’t as beautiful, healthy and not in pain.

But since that night, I’ve been trying to not think about that night so bad. Still working on getting out of the bad habit and not thinking about that one night that changed my hope and strength. Trying my best to continue taking best care of my nails with these nail treatments, taking biotin daily and a new one: going easier on them.

Trying harder to not pick at them, gain more self control; while in recovery for my depression. Gaining more grey matter in my brain to help contribute and help me gain self control of my old bad habit here.

Gonna continue moisturizing my hands and overall body daily again and not repainting my nails too much in a period of a week. Meaning moisturizing, wearing coloured nail polish and finding ways to keep myself including my nails/hands busy helps and contributes to help me heal, grow my nails and make them stronger again. For they are still quite weak and too short. I need to stay strong, hold onto the hope I still have and do all I can to motivate me to get my nails looking healthier and beautiful again like before that night.

But on top of that, working on my recovery from my depression. Taking my first trial of antidepressants once daily (smallest dose), practicing my coping methods for my mental health recovery and overall mental health, taking care of myself (personal hygiene), try to eat more foods to consume more calories to meet my 1200 calorie goal to consume per day.

And also continue taking care of my face, washing it twice daily (morning: face wash, night: face scrub), face mask once weekly, changing pillow cases every other night and anything else that is part of the caring for clearing up my acne. And also continue attending the meetings for the “intro to mindfulnesss group” and practicing meditation. And continue using my aromatherapy products for my mental health and practicing more self love, loving myself more one day at a time.

One more thing, is continue viewing “100 Days Of Self Care” posters which has impacted and helped me through my recovery and still continues to today and forever!

And in the meantime, today I’m gonna enjoy my massage with my sister today at 3pm and later spend the rest of the night with my best friend Courtney out for dinner at The Keg in Oakville and see “Keeping Up With The Jones” in the Oakville theatre on Winston Churchill. Enjoying the sleepover with Courtney at my parent’s house tonight and tomorrow. Having her stay longer tomorrow for my family birthday party at our house as well.

And then my official birthday diner on Monday night and open my birthday presents (Beatz, by Dr. Dre headphones, comfy lounge sweater, blue comfy warm sweater, and a purple pretty crop top) on Tuesday morning (official birthday, 20 years)!

Next post on further thoughts, etc on overall mental health, and entering the dating world once fully ready:

  • Identify who you are (who you want to become, with challenges from society’s expectations and standards)
  • Love yourself before you love someone else

Mental Health Post: Self Love & Entering The Dating World

Demi Lovato is a super great role model and example for pretty much every part of the mental health epidemic. She has and still continues to be a role model for millions of her fans.

She is living proof that you can live a normal and empowered life with mental illness.

Untreated mental illness can lead to suicide, substance abuse and long term medical issues – Fact

These celebs deserve a break from all the spotlight overall that comes with their job as a famous celebrity.

Mental health matters and so does everyone else as individuals. We deserve to care for ourselves more than we ever have over so many decades.

This is our time, our year to change things. We can change how we view ourselves, others and all the important epidemics, causes & isssues in our world.

Give each one the attention, care, treatment & action that each truly deserves. Never treat one person nor one epidemic/cause/issue any diffferently or more or less than another. Each person, issue, cause, and epidemic should be treated equally.

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