Rediscovering Myself

Going through all I went through in the past 3–4 years was a long and confusing roller coaster. But it gave me many things: new knowledge, many new wise thinking, better idea of what mental health is, how to care for it (take care of myself, which I never knew how until after going through something huge & life threatening chapter), numerous insightful thoughts I only gained from my own personal experiences and a few others too.

I also have to share with you that yes I’ve made a few mistakes or bad decisions in my life but I have accepted (as for I know no one can go back to fix their past mistakes & regrets) that I can’t change them, they happened, and I just have to learn from them, let them make me stronger and wiser and move on with my life. No more dwelling or letting my own parents hold me back (from dwelling and focusing on all the bad things I’ve done in my past life).

I’ve learned from them, and I did all that I had to do and now I plan and intend to move on. No more dwelling on what has already happened. Dwelling, arguing and fighting over things I can’t go back and change is not healthy nor gonna solve anything. And I know that is not good for anyone’s mental health. And my mental health is so very important and valuable to me and I will always consider it for every decision I make in my future.

Throughout many of the stages I accomplished with my recovery, I learned and gained a lot for myself. One of the big ones is loving oneself: myself. And it wasn’t easy on one part. The other, it was quite a journey. I learned a lot about loving yourself. From this quote below, it took me a while after listening to “Love Yourself” until I fully was able to understand that no matter how my parents have treated me over the years or whether or not they choose to improve and change their behaviour and anything else that’s needed, I knew and believed that I needed to try my absolute best to love myself gradually, naturally all on my own no matter what happens. And believe me it wasn’t easy for me, nor for anyone to love themselves. High school may educate us on whatever amount of knowledge on mental health & mental illness but not anything on “how to love ourselves”.

“You told me that you hated my friends. But the problem was with you and not them.” – Justin Bieber

That needs to change, what’s being taught on mental health and mental illness in high school is not enough. There needs to be a decision made with logical, wise and creative thinking to make these changes.

I’ve been through a lot and yes I’ve recovered from many of these things but it doesn’t mean it never happened. it only means that I’ve let it make me stronger and wiser and also strengthen me as a better and healthier human being both physically, academically, emotionally, and mentally. And I’ve learned a lot from each one of them which I’m truly and honestly grateful for and happy to have. I’m also past 18, I’m responsible and allowed/able to make my own decisions for myself without my parents being involved. But overall, I believe that I’ve come a long way with my recovery, but also doing the best I can while in relapse and in the process of my full diagnosis as well. A lot has happened with my mental health in the past few years and I’m taking better care of it.

And in conclusion, all the things that I’ve experienced in the past 4–5 years have gave me many new and helpful insightful thoughts, life lessons, and much more! And I also got all your support, help, advice with many things, which I’m so truly and happily grateful for! Thank you all for all that you are and have done for me!

Have gotten a lot of support, help, guidance, advice from the happier community in the “Happier” social media/gratitude journal that I’ve been using and a part of for about 4 years now. In which I truly reccomend to try: it’s not much like the other social media apps out there, but have interesting, fun, and helpful features that no other app offers. Like having the support, help, guidance, advice from the Happier community, courses that help you in certain areas (7 happier habits, everyday grateful, a meditation course that helps calm yourself at any time of the day, More Calm, Less Stress which helps with anxiety, stress in school and other related scenarios and more.

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