Mile 12, Palmwine cruise and the new African shrine.

If someone told me I’d be the guy on a Saturday morning, casual tees, ripped jeans and bathroom slippers, in the gutters of mile 12's goat market, looking for Sanni ‘the asun meat guy’, and shedding hell fire tears (oh god, the smoke!), I’d have started a fight.

Ayo is planning this thing; a place in Yaba for palmwine lovers (top it up with asun & good music). And then, our other guys were planning Pure Evolution Soccer [PES 2017] at Campos mini stadium, so we got a tent and decided to start testing our market. We made up our minds late so 48 hours was all we had. You’d laugh if I told you about how we pulled up at shoprite thinking we could get everything on the list there, stupid is what my mum called us.

So Saturday came and nothing was down, Ayuba and Dara went with the car to get palmwine and other things, then Ayo and I made our way to Mile 12, mile 12! There was this very serious accident around Ojota..sweet Jesus :(

Got to Mile 12 market and boots weren’t available (listen sis, you gotta wear boots because the place is really messy) so we’ll have to wallow through goat market — another name for gutter, with bathroom slippers.

Mind you, I’ve always had mile 12 on my list, one of the places we intend to explore when LiveGoodAfrica launches but I just didn’t see this coming, so I took it as a challenge. We found Sanni Mayo, the guy someone directed us to, mans was so happy and even happier when I told him my mum is hausa, then sad again — when I told him I’ve been trying to learn the language all my life. He gave us a full goat at our half goat budget, sanni is indeed a great man.

Even though I couldn’t help but scratch my eyes at intervals and groan in my pain (no breakfast yet, 11:05AM) I took time to get a vivid view of the country’s biggest market.

‘Without these guys, we’ll starve to death’ Ayo said, I nodded my head in complete agreement. So why isn’t mile 12 properly taken care of? I mean, this is our food, outchea in an avoidable mess.

I watched how a seven years old boy played with his knife and butchered his way through the animal, I saw how old women joked and laughed without caring about the environment, as though it was normal, atarodo, shombo and tomatoes.

We crossed the road several times, trying to get other stuff while our goat was roasted.

12:30PM, we’re done! let me take a picture of Sanni and order a ride, but phone battery crisis happened. We tried looking for someone with at least an android phone, buy data and do our thing but we figured out that only 1 out of 20 people in mile 12 market use an android phone. One guy even laughed hard and joked about how he couldn’t afford ‘almighty android’, this isn’t even the time to talk about Unconnected Africa so let’s continue.

We found this guy with a Sony Ericsson phone I used in Basic 7, the uber app couldn’t even open after downloading, epic. We called Anthony and he came through for us. This time, the road was already mess-ier, thank God for the annoying driver who knew the in and out of the locality so we avoided traffic and vibed to majek fashek all the way.

3:30PM, we were on third mainland bridge, loud music, sipping palmwine and setting out to do business for an event that started at 9AM, we got there chilled just because in our heads ‘we didn’t really need the money, we were just testing a market’ L O L.

So 4:30PM came and palmwine cruise started, glad people enjoyed the palmwine because it was my plug (I can only do good stuff — proud!). The asun was extra nice too! We even got blunts for the jonzers, our tent literally turned into a meetup, people buying palmwine and peppered goat meat and also exchanging ideas, felt great.

We’d pack up at 8:00PM, leave the venue with more people in the car, get some good food and make our way to the new African shrine. We invented something nice: ‘the aux license’ — only the music brave can get this, for the purpose of entertaining the squad while we ride through Lagos city waves, I’m the only recipient for now.

Shrine was full, I really hate it when it’s like this. I suggested that we pay for a nice parking space exactly in front of the gate and vibe. Not everyone was open to the idea so some left while Ayuba, Dara, Ayo and I stayed out, we guaged all the drama, danced, made new friends and dragged the loud, one at a time.

Sonia came through so we both zoned out for a bit, then she left.

I remember buying coffee too.

Prodigal squad was out already and they couldn’t stop lamenting about their distaste for eazi’s lack of good stage performance (I will just zip my mouth here). We gave the angry birds more palmwine to chill out, and just like that, we’d end the day and drive to my apartment in Yaba, sleep for a few hours and have old man come pick us up at noon (sunday) just because he spent the weekend all alone.

Just another random weekend in Lagos, city of aquatic (flood) splendor 💛.

Asun is peppered goat meat, something a lot of nigerians attend wedding for, don’t blame them, blame buhari.

Atarodo, shombo & tomatoes are essentials for making peppery stew/soup, you can only understand if you grew up nigerian.

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