Father and Daughter

Photo by Noah Silliman on Unsplash

It’s mostly mid of winter, at the time where you got used to the dark clouds invading the sky and the cold’s fresh smell in the morning. But still amazed by those moments when it rains gently, that sounds is just so relaxing, you can’t help it but catching the sound of the rain drops in the background seeking a momentum peace of mind.

So did I. I was far from home, at the end of a business trip where the couple last days were really crowded and fully scheduled, having breakfast and enjoying coffee in that rainy morning, before joining the rest of the group. We decided to spent the last day getting to know each other and have general conversations and go around the city. Since we done our job and the mission is completed, lets get to know each other before we go back to our countries with stories to tell.

I spent the time chatting with Jack, the person I communicated with the most virtually before we meet face to face.

Jack said: I’d normally start with the question, do you have kids? but I assume you look young to be a mum? Yes sir, I have no kids, I said laughing, and instantly reversed the question, and you? Yes! Mai, my little angel! he answered passionately like he’s declaring a victory. I got Mai, my angel, she’s back home waiting for me, his eyes said. I smiled from my heart, sure thing I wanna know more about little Mai.

Photo by Juliane Liebermann on Unsplash

Tell me about her!

Jack: Mai is my only child, she’s 12 years old, very talented girl, she plays piano, and guitar, she has 8 cats and the number is increasing, she also wanna start playing Tennis and thinking about mastering chess! she’s lovely but very opinionated haha!.

Me: Wow she’s so energetic! she’s doing a lot! and also to have opinions at this age, I mean to be able to form opinions independently is actually a good thing.

Jack: Yes of course, but the thing is, that now she’s at age where she thinks of leaving Home and moving to the city, our lifestyle is not appealing to her anymore, soon she will need to go to high school and I will have to send her away to the city to study there.

Said jack, and it was like his only concern at that moment and the only thing that mattered is how Mai will be leaving him in the next couple years and how he will have to send her away. I saw how a father is thinking of saying goodbye to his only child, like he’s never gonna see her again, his eyes said it clearly, I want her to stay.

I soon wanted to change the subject to something less stressful for him.

Me: You said she don’t like our lifestyle anymore? am I missing something, where you guys exactly live and how life it looks right there?

Photo by Frances Gunn on Unsplash

Jack: We live in a farm near the woods, 60km away of the city, Monaco. We do everything by ourselves, we only eat the planets we grew and the animals we raise. Even my cigarettes are organic, we plant them in our farm.

At this point I was already noticed how he’s rolling his cigarettes whenever he needed to smoke one, and I found it weird, now that I knew, I was like aha! that’s why you’ve been rolling these around.

Jack continued: Milk, butter, cheese, eggs, beef, tomatoes, spinach, you name it, everything we consume we produce it in our farm, as little as possible, and the extra on our need we manage to sell it in the market.

Me: That’s really impressive! you know that you’re talking about the image of the ideal life in my mind. You guys have a leveraged lifestyle! But how you do manage it, no, more of how you did start the whole thing?

Jack: My wife, Sarah, she grew up in a farm family, she’s by heart a great farmer! she’s so gifted and she knows what she’s doing and taking care of the whole farm from supervision the workers, deciding when and what to plant, and producing dairies. She’s surprisingly never tired, she loves what she’s doing, and loves her routine. And for me, I’m the guy who grew up in the city with no background on how living in the woods looks like! and if you ask me twenty years ago that I will live the life I’m living now, I wouldn’t believe it!

Me: How great! Sarah is impeccable! she’s doing a great job, you know this is the ultimate form of “I take care of my family”?

Jack: Yes Indeed, when we first met, she said right away that she won’t live in the city, she simply can’t, and I was why not try out this lifestyle, and I ended up loving it and not willing to give it away

But of course there’s down sides and troubles we face usually, like our farm is exactly near the woods, from time to time, wolves break through the farm and attack chickens, this been causing us damage lately, even we installed a detection and alarm system, but it was not that much efficient, by the time you hear the alarm and going to act it’s already over and the damage happened. also, our farm is far away from everything, I have to drive 45 minutes to the city where’s my office located.

Other than that, we find our life peaceful and healthy, great food and fresh air everywhere.

But this life is not suitable for Mai anymore, and she can’t wait just to leave it behind…

Let her have her own way in this life, that’s exactly what she needs

Me: I understand your worries, you’re a father trying to protect his child, but will that do her any good though? keeping her close to you, in the woods, she might have a peaceful life, fresh air, panic from wolves from time to time lol. But as she needs peace and quite, she also needs experiences, she needs noise and lights!

Jack: It’s hard enough to think that she will handle her things alone, she will always need help, and when she need us, we will be faraway from her.

Me: exactly, what she needs is to learn how to solve problems, and the city will give her that, she will grow, she will see the world, her intuition will expand, her cognitive ability will be increased, she will have to deal with different people, make friends, breakup with them, she will know love as well hate, she will be responsible for her life and accountable for her own actions as no one by her side to make decisions on her. But no matter how her days will pass, she will always miss you both, remember you, and keep you close. Her pure childhood in the farm will be the anchor that give her balance whenever things gets vague and darker.

Jack wasn’t totally convinced but he realized that eventually she will have her own life that it will be different than him and Sarah’s.

Jack: Yes Rima, you are right, she needs the city, and she needs to be out there and face the world, but let’s hope that no one will break her heart hahah!

Jack after that showed me a picture of Mai holding some of her cats, she has a dark black hair, and beautiful eyes. She was smiling that you can count all of her teeth. She is indeed an energetic girl that just waiting to explore the outside world!

Photo by Daiga Ellaby on Unsplash

I think Jack’s feelings towards his only child is pretty understood, parents can’t help it but be protective, and most of the time they hold their children very close that they end growing up missing things. If you have a child, raise them as healthy as possible as stable as possible, and know that one day they will have to face the world weather you approve it or not. So make them ready for it, more like, be the one who put them out there.

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