Am I Okay ?

Am I okay ? Of course. Every time you ask me if I’m okay, I hear a crack when i smile to let you know everything is good. One day I realize I that crack wasn’t coming from my smile, but from my heart. Whenever I smile, my heart cracks into pieces. I look you in your face and smile even when I feel nothing but pain on the inside. when I’m alone I shed tears because the pain becomes too much. I have to hug myself in order to stop to tell myself that it will be okay. I then pick myself up and wipe the tears away and continue my day like nothing happened. Until I come home to my room and lay on my bed. That’s when I can actually hear my heart breaking as if it was broken glass. Am I okay when I cry myself to sleep every night? Am I okay when I feel nothing but pain on the inside ? Am I okay when every close person around me can’t see that I need them ? Was I okay when I cut my wrist and took sleeping pills just to stop the hurt? You tell me , would you be okay if that was you ?