Ladies how any times have you done this? You just met a hot guy and you like him and you think he likes you too maybe-he acts like it so far. Anyway you want to make sure he has no excuse not to want you so you start doing things like calling him after a date to tell him what a good time you had cooking for him,putting other plans on hold in case he decides to see you,spending money on new outfits just for him, Liking EVERYTHING he posts ( even though he rarely likes any of yours) and then sleeping with him on the third date or less God forbid and all he did was take you out for drinks a few times…Sigh…then he starts pulling back it seems or maybe even disappears altogether and you’re are left blind sighted wondering WTF? and ” after all I did… What’s wrong with me”?? Don’t beat yourself up too much. Many of us have been there. I certainly have. You did nothing wrong but give too much to a man who gave little. You over invested.
You’re probably a really caring person who likes helping people- I understand. I am that way as well but I have finally learned that it is NOT ever a woman’s place or in her best interest to give so much to a man early on or try and prove herself. You do not have to go doing all this stuff trying to prove what a great wifey you would be.It can have the exact opposite effect of what you are trying to create and come off as too intense,desperate or even motherly! and if the guy is a taker and a user- well — he’s going to do just that. If a guy really likes you- you don’t have to do much at all. Most guys will try and impress you at first ( and some just to see how fast they can get in your pants ) but just because he takes you out to a party or whatever doesn’t not mean you owe him anything other than a “thank you”. You don’t have to start acting like a lovesick school girl and overgiving just because he did what he should be doing. So the next time you are crushing on a guy-relax! Take your time observing him and getting to know him before you start giving yourself a way. that is what dating is for. See who he is and what he does before you invest full and then act accordingly. Mirror him. If he is not putting in much effort then you definitely should not either.
Don’t give him 100% when he is only giving 10%
Originally published on Wordpress