Morning routine of a working class hero

Your listicles are bullshit to us

#RiseAndShine is trending on Instagram every Saturday. We read about healthy morning habits, and try to inherit those into our own routine the best way possible. Vloggers make videos on Youtube showing us how they spend the first few hours of their day, and viewers pick on small things thinking they’ll make a difference. Monday morning is a term in itself, and we just love to joke about it. Children know from a very young age, that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Needless to say, mornings play a huge part in our life.

No matter what we actually do in the morning, we all know what we should. Atleast most of us do. We just like things easy, and breakfast is easy to forget. So when someone tells us they can make our mornings easier, or smoother, we listen carefully. And when we run into an listicle about “Ways to improve your morning routine”, we click to open. We click on them just to realize it’s all about creating new habits, and we click away because we know we’re too lazy.

Then there’s the other reason some of us click away. See, some of us know that because our job starts at 6AM, these listicles are not made for us. We work at a store, nursing home, factory or construction site. We need to be in our uniforms at 6AM sharp, and we start working asap. So our mornings are not about increasing health, motivation or efficiency. We don’t have the time to meditate, read a book or go for a hike in the morning. We wake up at 4:45, blindly go make some coffee, start dressing up and take the dog out. That’s all we have time for. Then we walk to our car, and start driving to work. Or take the buss. Yep, the buss, not an uber.

Our mornings are about surviving. Our mornings are about deciding what we can do in 30–45 minutes, and leaving out the rest. We work for someone else, and we don’t wear a suit while doing it. The 10 things every billionare does in the morning, are the first things we leave out. Sometimes including brushing our teeth (Because we promise ourself we’ll do it in the afternoon).

Sometime ago a friend of mine talked about how she thinks everyone should try to look their best everyday. You know, first impressions and stuff. Even though I’d have time to put on makeup, dress up and select the perfect jewelry; I can’t. Nurses aren’t allowed to have even perfume at my job. And how does dressing up help me when I need to change in to my uniform the second I get to work?

From Monday to Friday, my mornings are simply not Instagram -material. But because I work for someone else, does that mean I have to give up my mornings as well? I could always wake up earlier, but how early would that be; 3AM? I bet that wouldn’t be healthy either. I know I’d be a better employee if I could have more time in the mornings. Maybe even a happier person. I wouldn’t become a billionaire, but maybe more balanced.

So to you, the writer of those listicles, stop pretending like perfect mornings are just an attitude change away from all of us. Wake up to the real world, please. I believe in positive energy, but #PositiveThinking doesn’t change the position most of us are at.

I’d like to make afternoons the new mornings. Dinner the new breakfast. #AfterWork the new #RiseAndShine. 4PM routine the new morning routine. Start making listicles about that and I’ll salute you.