Texts From My Lyft Driver

7:30 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, is here! Look for the blue Kia Spectra.

7:31 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, is here!

7:35 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, would like to know if you know what a Kia Spectra looks like?

7:36 AM

Your Lyft driver is wondering if you are you blue/green color blind? It’s common in men.

7:37 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, sees you peeking through the blinds.

7:38 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, would like to know if that’s you or a human-like shadow?

7:40 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, doesn’t have time for this crap! This is her third job!

7:43 AM

LYFT CANCELLED: We’re sorry, Toni has cancelled the Lyft request. Please submit a new request.

7:44 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, didn’t mean to cancel the ride. She’s just not a morning person.

7:45 AM

This is Lyft. You cannot text this number. To reach your driver, use the call button in the app.

7:46 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, doesn’t talk about herself in the third person, if that’s why you’re stalling. It’s just how this app works.

7:46 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, is here! She’s a human being capable of love and pain like the rest of you damned fools!

7:49 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, has made a blood oath to Meili the Norse god of travel and will complete this ride, even if it kills her!

7:50 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, is walking to your door. You brought this on yourself, pal.

7:51 AM

Your Lyft driver is ringing your doorbell and screaming from hidden places in her soul! Meilil’s strength flows through her in all his terror!

7:55 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, was at the wrong apartment. She is on her way.

8:00 AM

Your Lyft driver, Toni, is here! Look for the blue Kia Spectra. She’s sorry you’re late.

8:01 AM

Thanks for riding with Lyft. Here’s a FREE day of rides on us! Use code: 670952.

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