somewhere #3

I felt bitter, but better, too. I snuck outside after we had sex. Bottomless, I sat on the stoop and bummed a cigarette. Thinking, this is it — Stacie, you said what you had to say. All or nothing. You can now move on.

Last night — I poured out all my feelings. And left them at his house. Probably won’t go back to claim them. He can deal with it. He can keep them, toss them, recycle them, or cook them and eat them. At some point during our conversation, i caught insincerity from his eyes. That’s when promises and lies choked me again.

“I lost my best friend. I got out of a very intense relationship. I don’t wan’t it if this is a thing that is.. so fleeting and going to disappear so soon.”

“it’s too early to make those decisions, don’t you think?”