Recipe: Thyroid Supporting Juice #1

The Mightiest of all Mighty Ingredients!

The thyroid. 25 grams of lean, green, hormone makin’ endocrine tissue perched like a butterfly on my lady’s apple.

I’m on Day 5 of Juice Fast 2017.

To make it feasible, I head over to my local natural grocery store, pack 2–3 large shopping bags full of produce, then walk it over to their juice bar to squeeze and bottle it for me. Painless. Efficient. Affordable. All traditional Tiger Mom values.

It works out to about $5.50 per pint of fresh organic juice of my choosing.

The wrong juice can crash your thyroid. Say hello to 90 extra pounds!

Following a Washington juice feast in 2014, where my provider may have used thallium-contaminated kale in my juice, my thyroid crashed. My doctor at the time, Jonathan Collin, editor of the Townsend Letter, drew an EDTA chelation blood test to check heavy metals in my body. Turns out, I had an off-chart blood spike of thallium higher than the test could calculate.

What happened after that? I uncontrollably gained 90 pounds in 2 months. Naturally I cut that feast short to 10 days and refused to juice feast again in the pacific northwest. So many emotions. I hated that this valuable tool (juice feasting) had become poison to me. And worse: no one wanted to believe me.

After that juice cleanse, to heal my thyroid, I wasn’t pounding wedding cakes with a side of red wine and lard. I was consuming strictly grass fed, grass finished, local organic goods.

Enter, a juice recipe for thyroid support.

First, we start with a base. This base is modeled after Elissa Goodman’s thyroid juice found at my favorite market, Erewhon in Los Angeles, but with reduced sweets. My prediabetic body can’t tolerate sweets.

I’m avoiding goitrogenic vegetables like the brassica family, to determine whether that matters for me. I’ve also increased my dietary intake of iodine by adding Indonesian irish moss (a sea vegetable), Nascent Iodine, and Selenomethionine (to counter how heated I can get with Iodine).

Thyroid Green Juice Base:

  1. 4 bunches dandelion greens
  2. 4 bunches parsley, italian and curly
  3. 2 bunches asparagus (also tonic for the liver!)
  4. 4 lemons
  5. 4 cucumbers
  6. 2 bunches celery
  7. 1 bunch mint

Take 2/3 of this base, and add 1/3 pressed raw coconut milk from a young coconut.

This recipe made about 5 1/2 pints of juice base. From there, I enriched the juice base further.

I added the following to 2 pints of the Thyroid juice base:

Enrichment #1:

  1. 1 tbsp Biofilm Herbal Extract Formula, Samsara Herbs. From the manufacturer: “Our Biofilm formula contains 5 herbs which are renowned in dealing with biofilms. These herbs (Terminalia Chebula, Zedoaria, Sparganium, Turmeric, Stevia) have been found to aid in breaking down biofilms while improving immunity to resist the infections that cause them.”
  2. 2 tbsp Irish Moss Gel, Transition Nutrition. I met Transition Nutrition’s David Kaplan in line at Whole Foods in Baltimore and we backed up the entire line nerding out to spirulina and raw food for half an hour. David healed himself of a gunshot wound with raw food. And made a totally tubular company in the process. Irish Moss is one of my favorite ingredients on the planet, I add it to everything. First introduced to me while I was in raw food chef training at Juliano Brotman’s now extinct Santa Monica hangout, Planet Raw. (Dang, that was a lot of namedropping.)
  3. 2 tbsp Body Force Free Liver. More chaca piedra than any product for the price. Pain in the ass to procure. Has everything in it your liver needs to thrive.
  4. 2 tbsp XCT oil. Brain. Made. Of Fat. Juice doesn’t really have fat. Mom needs fat.
  5. 3 Nijiya Market Egg Yolks. Why Nijiya? Because they source outside of California, a radiation zone. Wanna know the secret to discovering where your eggs were laid? Check this out!
  6. 2 drops/pint Nascent Iodine.

I spun all this into my blender and refrigerated. Bam. Feels great.

The stevia makes this juice quite cloyingly sweet, and I have a hard time believing the body won’t produce an insulin spike after the tongue experiences this sort of sweet. For all the people out there who *believe* monkfruit, stevia, xylitol, erythritol, and all the other “natural” sweeteners are a license to sweeten everything with no consequences, I am suspect. Without a glucose monitor though, I can’t really tell what happens to *my* biochemistry. I will leave this musing for a future episode.

Sooo. Thyroid enriching juice. Will it help prevent adverse thyroid events? Will it help balance my hormones? Time and close monitoring of my glands will tell.

I reckon it’s about time to go get a thyroid hormone draw to establish my baseline.