“Free Pizza- all day, just today.” The website repeated the phrase like your mother telling you not to forget to buy the milk. I pocketed my phone and turned to Sarah, I was getting those half slit eyes of annoyance. I figured there would be a line but it was wrapped around the building. We were waiting for the Iphone of pizzas.

Between every couple of people stood a worker bee. They each wore a plain black polo shirt with a small flame embroidered on the pectoral. “Jeez Samantha, we aren’t really going to wait in this for an eight dollar pizza are we?” Sarah asked, one of the bees started to buzz in our direction.

“Eh it’ll be no time. Look, we’re already moving.” I said, the line inched forward to close a gap made by deserters.

“May I see your hands?” One of the bees said to us. He was an older gentleman and a little name tag said he was an owner. He had an inkpad and a stamp in his right hand, his left was gripping a stack of menus.

“Yeah sure!” Sarah replied, slipping her phone back into the wallet on a string.

“Stamps? Great idea. More places should do this.” I said. The man pressed and rolled the little fire emblem deep on to the back of my hand.

“Yeah, we just started doing it about three. Too many people started cutting and this keeps everyone happy. Got to tell the man at the door- ‘anyone past me has to have a stamp or no pizza’. Everyone’s happy about it.” He closed the inkpad and smiled at us.

“Gotta let the bouncer do his job right? That’s what he’s for.” I said that to a bush next to us.

“That’s absolutely right, ha, Rick as a bouncer…he’ll get a kick outta that. Ya’ll enjoy now.” The black polo’ed man took to the next group in line. Despite it all we were moving up in line and it was growing behind us like a vine in summer time.

“You make the dumbest jokes.” Sarah said, pulling her phone out again.

“Hey, he laughed. That’s what matters. Every fifth one is great if you ask me.” I replied, the clouds started to dim the lights.

“Maybe every fifteenth one, but sure Samantha.” Sarah tapped three times on her phone and pushed it near my face, “look what Molly said.” My eyes bounced across the screen, Molly was angry about some social media page but it wasn’t important. “We’re watching the entire strand when we finish eating this shit. It better be a good pizza.”

“It’ll be a great pizza. Free pizza is always great pizza, its the definition of a college financial plan.” I took a step forward in line, the group in front of us had umbrellas leaning up against the rails. The bee that had the stamp was telling everyone behind us the expected wait time but no one seemed to flinch.

“Once you hit that orange umbrella, the closest one, ya’ll are about an hour away. It really ain’t too bad. Lunch was smaller but it got too right about here. Most of ‘em made it back within their lunch break.” His voice dwindled as he moved to the next group a few steps back.

“Sam. It’s gonna be two hours!” Sarah said.

“We’re staying. It won’t take too long, they always elongate these things, like the estimates.” I replied.

“Fine. But, if it starts to rain…” she started.

“We’re out. I’ll do alot for pizza but, ruin my hair? Come on, who am I?” I said, running my hands through my hair.

“You and that horrible, poofy, natural curl…” Sarah laughed, we moved up yet another step. The line was moving steadily to the door, some abandoned, or squeezed together, but progress was made. We reached the second umbrella, less than an hour left, when it all happened. Thunder sounded, streaks of light flashed and the rain- wasn’t present. Heat lightning according to the group behind us, or that’s what they discussed between the talk of recent movies.

They weren’t right, just jumping to conclusions. The rain started just as the thunder came close enough to shake our eardrums. “Dammit! We’re so close!” Sarah jumped an inch in anger.

“Pssh, the rain’s going to pass over us in no time.”

“Sam. You said the same thing about the line.” She said.

“And I wasn’t THAT wrong! It’s only been an hour and fifteen. Our buddy back there said it would be at least two.”

“Do I have a pizza in front of me yet? No. Clock’s still ticking.”

“Well we can abandon. We can quit. Lose the last hour and make for the noodle place across the shopping mall.” I rocked back and forth on my heels, I tried to sell how easily I could be persuaded. Sarah watched for a moment. She wiped a single drop of rain off her shoulder and flicked it like a booger you could be proud of.

“I’ll stick. Better be a damn good pizza.”

“It’ll be the best pizza you have all week. There’s arugula and…” Sarah started giggling.

“Who files that in the pro column? I mean what the hell Samantha! Could you be any more stereotypical.”

“Yeah. I could be wearing a baseball hat and some sperry’s right now.”

“You’re ketchup. Just so often, you’re ketchup.” She replied, covering her laughs of embarrassment with her hand.

“See! That was one of my jokes!”

“Yeah, it was like the fiftieth of the day. I’ll admit you can be funny, rarely.” She said, we took another step forward. The umbrellas of all the guests around us deployed.

“It was beautiful, poetry really. ‘Ketchup, the white people of condiments.’” I relived the moment, arm swing and all.

“Jesus you’re not that funny.”

“Don’t tell him that, he might smite you.” I replied. She let the silence roll her eyes back, the line was moving more now just like the rain. We were fortunate enough to surrounded by two groups of umbrella wielders. Pity is a beautiful weapon if you wield it right and Sarah certainly could. The groups around us glued their umbrellas together so that we could survive the shower.

We were nearly around the corner. The bouncer, and what kind of pizza place has a bouncer really, was in sight. He wore the same black polo as the man who’d misjudged our wait time. “Yeah, that’s about right,” Sarah bashed the side of her phone against her palm.

“What on Earth is that gonna do Sarah?”

“Shit Sam I don’t even know anymore! It won’t load okay? What would you do?” She asked.

“Uh, be patient? Live in the moment? Twiddle my thumbs? There are countless things.” I replied.

“Well I was going to share this incredibly frightening video with you but now I can’t so its more your lose than mine.” Sarah said.

“I hate frightening videos. It’s always super weird ones with you too.”

“Yeah, like Salad Fingers. That one’s Molly’s favorite.” Sarah seemed to check a window playing a memory in her mind for a split second.

“I have no idea what that is.”

“You’re kidding. Salad Fingers?” Sarah asked, she changed her voice to a creepy drawl. “And you look tasty Mr. Gray…yummm yes you are tasty.”

“Yeah…no. Nor do I want to see that.” I was awestruck her voice could turn to such a melting creepy sound. The line pressed on, we were under the first of two awnings now, the second held the bouncer.

“We’ll watch it when we get back to your house. Is it cool if I chill out there, I’d rather not be home until a bit later?” Sarah asked.

“Yeah that’s fine. I’m not watching that Salad Finger thing though.” Sarah threw up an eyebrow. I would be watching that Salad Finger video unless I could think my way out of it. “Well at least pizza is within arms reach now.”

“Clocks still ticking.” Sarah said, still pleading with her phone to link itself to freedom.

“Oh who are you kidding? You won’t abandon the line now, we’ve survived rain and close to two hours of waiting.”

“Nearly.” Sarah replied. Her phone must have linked up. I could see her eyes bounced around from left to right, like a game of pong in a loop. The giant window panes gave you a clear view of the staff and the patrons. It was packed. There was one family, just two tables back and one table in, with four kids and both parents. One child was wearing headphones as he ate around the crust. The other had some electronic keeping him isolated.

“Hey look at this. I’ll never let my kid eat dinner with us if they did something like that.” I pointed my finger but that’s usually ineffective in situations like this.

“Yeah, what are you pointing at exactly?” Sarah asked, bobbing her head around the window.

“The kid, just behind this orange guy. He’s got headphones on, they’re blatantly our most hated brand.”

“Beats- what a piece of shit right? I still don’t see them.” Sarah said.

“Look from the railing , the second table up from the door.”

Ah yeah. That’s kinda messed up that he’s just, ignoring his family. I agree, I’ll berate my children for doing that. But…” Sarah said.

“Kids these days…I feel like the parents give up on teaching them manners.”

“So, I’m trying to be nicer about people. Since we just always assume the worst. What if that kid has social anxiety and he has to have some silence so he doesn’t get scared?” Sarah said, she was watching the boy so intently we left a gap in the line.

“Well you go right ahead and do that. I think the kid’s a dick.” I said. I walked up to the bouncer, we were just about to gain entrance somehow.

“Oh no, one of us has to or the apocalypse will start. So by all means the gauntlet has fallen to you.” Sarah said.

“Excuse me, did you go to Louisville?” The bouncer asked Sarah, pointing at her lettering down her sweatpants.

“No, but I root for them.”

“Oh where do you go? Kentucky?” He asked as he checked the line inside.

“Xavier actually. Right up on the edge of Cincinnati.”

“Oh, I’m from around there- do you know Dayton?”

“Yeah its a great little city. I go to concerts all the time in the Dayton Community Complex.” Sarah replied, she was eyeing the line inside too.

“They have a great basketball team. It’s not Louisville but still. They’re Division One right?”

“Yeah but only in basketball, we don’t even try and play football or anything.” Sarah said, the pizza was practically so close you could steal it.

“Well I wish you the best of luck, you too sir. Enjoy the pizza folks.” The bouncer opened the door and there we were finally. It was an orange and grey interior with a wood fire pizza oven and stacks of fresh dough. Everything smelled like sauce and cheese. It was a sight worth the wait.

The menu had every topping you’d want on a pizza, even a little bit of spinach. They bragged about their one hundred and eighty second cook time, and rightfully so. This pizza chain was going places and I wanted to be at every one of them.

Sarah pushed me ahead so she could decide. We’d eaten here before but she had this same issue of being caught between the hot seat and the cold menu. “What are you getting?” She asked.

“The pesto pizza I think. I might switch for the spicy sauce.” I stepped up to the line and repeated just that, I gave them my name and moved along down the line. They weren’t kidding about the one hundred and eighty seconds, as soon as I filled my drink and sat down they called out my name. It was a luscious bubbling circle and it was exactly what I needed. I grabbed Sarah’s pizza too and we dug in. The tray was nearly as hot as the pizza but it wasn’t a deterrent. I pulled and bit the cheesy circle until my mouth couldn’t take the heat anymore. Even then I’d occasionally push past it. Leaving nothing but a trail of bouncing happy tastebuds and minor burns but it was all worth it. The wait, the heat, the rain, everything because I had it now- a free pizza of my own making that was both delicious and in great company.

We’d only been there for fifteen minutes by the time the trays were crumb free. I bolted to the bathroom. The bee who had greeted us earlier stood by the door, “how was everything?”

“Delicious. Thanks for everything.”

“Of course, next time I suggest the spicy sauce. You know a louisville basketball player is a co-owner?”

“Your doorman mentioned that.” I left him without a farewell and slipped into the bathroom door.

I came out shaking my hands from the faucet. Sarah was waiting, tapping her foot against the floor. “Let’s watch salad fingers Sam.” I nodded and the exit door led us right to her car. The store was but a fleeting emblem in her rearview mirror only minutes later.