Ummm... I buy your central premise, that Trump’s supporters are at least partially political trolls reveling in nihilism out of despair. Your fundamental understanding of the role of gender in this is also solid- men who feel disempowered by women because they have been sold the idea that they are Owed women’s bodies (although only attractive women) and that now they feel that women (of all people!) are denying them this status symbol and source of emotional and physical comfort out of spite or a sense of superiority are not, in fact, disempowered, but rather choking on the idea that their initial assumption was flawed.
So when you suggest that the way out of this is to… what? Validate the feelings of these men, and pat them on their hurt little man-child heads, telling them that “Yes, nobody has ever been hurt how you’ve been hurt”, thus reinforcing the idea of gender difference as valid, you lose credibility. These men are NOT children. They are NOT tantrum-throwing toddlers. They are adult fucking men, and they are so caught up in their totally illusory sense of disempowerment that they have grabbed the rest of us by the balls (as it were) out of spite and now are pissed that we seem to continue to believe that they have not in fact suffered. How precisely will privileging the centrality of their perspective YET AGAIN break this cycle?
The divide is not between those supporting a hegemonic status quo and those who want Revolution or to say Fuck You to the Man. It is between those who have collapsed into sobbing heaps of “You’re a Mean Mommy, Where’s my Cookie” despair (on both the Left and the Right) and those of us who still have to hold our shit together because we have ACTUAL suffering to worry about. I suggest we try something new- we give these giant babies something to REALLY cry about and see how they feel about suffering once they see it up close.
Their misogyny is based in just that- Misogyny. Their White Supremacy is as transparent. These are societal lessons learnt too well, as you suggested. They learned that they were supposed to be handed everything, and now they are HORRIFIED that this hasn’t panned out. Notice how this hasn’t shocked the rest of us. So how DARE we carry on when they’ve been so grievously injured? We’re supposed to be kowtowing to them, aren’t we? Let them opt out of their masturbatory downward spiral at their leisure. Meanwhile, the rest of us will do what we always do- tread water. And if we can kick down at the fuckers while we do it, so much the better.