Outside the Maze: Deleted Scenes

A barren, dusty wasteland. Somewhere outside the outcast town of Pariah.Three riders are seen approaching the foreground.

Cowboy #1: Reckon it’s not long now.

Cowboy #2: [turns to third rider] Rest assured the reward will be handsome, as sure as this trail is dusty. You’ll be happy you saddled up with us, friend.

Trump: The reward is going to be the greatest reward either of you to cyborgs has ever scene, because I am the best at winning rewards.

CB2: You talk funny, but I ‘spose that’s normal for you newcomers.

Trump: That’s the sound of winning. The liberal media doesn’t want you to hear it.

Speaking of winning, have I mentioned that I am going to win this game? And if there is a game within a game, I am going to win that too, bigly.

CB1: Well sir, that’s beyond what I care to know or do. My concerns are water for my horse, gold for my pocket, and a fine glass of whiskey after a long week’s work out on the trail.

Trump: And I am the only one who can give you that. The only one, believe me. You think Hillary Clinton would have been able to bring down that group of bandits?

CB2: [to CB1, through his teeth] Seems he’s already forgotten how much he helped.

CB1: I reckon getting bucked from his horse helped him with that long nap while we took out that Union shipment.

Trump: Now I’m going to win the maze. Where is Arnold? He started all of this, and it’s Hillary’s fault. John Podesta talked about the maze in his emails with Arnold. [reaches for .45, CB1 + 2 both flinch]


CB2: Easy does it friend, no need for the three of us to ride into Pariah with a open wound. Besides, if you’re looking for more satisfaction, there’s plenty a warm body who’ll be your companion for the night.

Trump: Will Dolores be there? I am going to move on her like a bitch. When you’re a guest, they let you do anything. [holsters weapon]


This post originally appeared on 30 Days in November, a month-long writing project that has nothing to do with writing a novel.