Why I’m Grateful for Being Trans

So today is the Transgender Day of Visibility. Hi, everyone. Is there anyone left in my sphere who did not know I’m a trans woman?

I love being transgender. I truly do. Discovering Serah and letting her grow was the best thing Steve ever did for himself. Womanhood feels right to me. I’m better at it than I ever was at manhood. My core emotional self is the same, but it comes out of me more naturally. I voice what I’m thinking and feeling more spontaneously, and I smile more genuinely. No, it’s not a “women are allowed to do feelings and men aren’t” thing — it’s personal. Steve always believed in emotional openness, and he was actually pretty good at it, but he never really felt grounded in himself. There were no obvious red flags, but being male and testosterone-ruled fit him like clothes just one size too small. He never knew it until he tried me on, and found out what the right fit feels like.

That’s something I wish more cisgender people understood — so let’s try. It is NOT about social roles. Fairly often I’ll hear idealism about “abolishing binary gender,” or sentiments like “If the world wasn’t so judgmental about how men and women are supposed to dress and act, nobody would need to be trans.” But I’ve never heard a trans person say it — even non-binary ones. I didn’t change my body and my name and my clothes for other people. I care about how I’m seen…