Being open doesn’t mean being vulnerable. We often mistake one for another, though. And if you open up, certainly you should be prepared to the fact that you will be attacked in your vulnerable spots. That’s just a common sense for anyone who needs to attack you for one reason or another.

When you aren’t confident that you can (or want to) withstand that, this vulnerability turns into insecurity. You will close off, fake it, or attack in response. And this is totally normal.

There are different ways to get confident about your ability to overcome insecurities. “Faking it” is not one of them.

In the end, it all gets down to two things: 1. our emotional reactions and 2. our ability to handle them. Change the first one and you can be open without being emotionally vulnerable. Improve the second one and you will be able to bounce back and recover even if you are attacked where you are vulnerable. Change both and you’ll be unstoppable.

Personally, I tend to go the first way more than second, just because it is much simpler. :) This allowed me to be much more open about various things, which other people (mistakenly) perceive as me being vulnerable.