I wanted to hate her for leaving me empty

Bow front. That was the color of the trim that she picked out. I hated green. It took us all day to pick that color too. She was picky that way and as much as it annoyed me, I loved that about her. But who really likes green anyway and why did I have to sit here all day going through swatch after swatch listening to her go on and on about green? But I did, because that’s what you’re supposed to do.

“Stand up straight,” “Tuck your shirt in,” “Don’t slouch!” “What respectable girl is going to be with someone with slouchy shoulders?” “Arthur!” “I said stand up straight!”

But she did. She wanted me. She was always able to see the real me, not the overachieving, make your Pop proud kinda guy, you know a man’s man. Nope. Sometimes when she looked at me it felt as if she were looking into a window. I always wondered what it would feel like to love someone that could see so deeply into your soul, it felt as if they could see right through you. I guess it doesn’t even matter anymore because she is gone and all I’m left with is green.

I wanted to hate her for taking the best part of me with her. I wanted to hate her for leaving me empty. But I didn’t, I only hated everything green. I hated the grass, the trees and that stupid house with its ridiculous green trim. I remember the afternoon after she left I tried to rip the trim off of the windows just so I wouldn’t have to be reminded of her but I couldn’t even get that right. I am nothing without her.