I like your rules because in the end, we can only control ourselves. Ive sort of learned at 45 (after 17 years of online dating) that I just look for people I like to spend time with. Ive let myself hope a bridge too far exactly four times and in each of those times some truly shitty behavior happened. But (maybe because Im a sucker or entirely too willing to see the other persons actions through the scope of their particular situation) I steeled my heart and hung in there and to a one each apologized for their behavior (granted, sometimes years after the fact) and in each case I gained a friend. Im not saying the formations of those friendships haven’t left ugly and painful scars on my heart, but sometimes love comes to us in different ways and maybe trying to make it all romantic love is not the best way for me to live.