and there are some days where the bags under my eyes are too dark and the frown on my face is deeper than usual. my clothes are so big that they swallow me whole. there is poison in my mind. the Devil behind my eyes. my face is hallowed from the days of not eating.

im sorry i can’t love you like you crave on those days, i try my best. and im sorry im so snappy because if i show even an ounce of affection, i’ll break. you can’t witness the downfall im feeling.

please dont let me show you my demons, im strong enough to handle them. im used to loneliness. to isolation. that’s what i need when this happens.

im sorry im so undeserving. im sorry i don’t take care of myself.

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