Why You Cannot Find “The One”
Heidi K. Isern

Hello Heidi

This piece showed up in my mailbox as Editor’s pick — So I tried reading it.

I am fascinated to know that you think this : “The “one” is created over time by slowly undressing who they are, not what they should be.” — Nevertheless, I am bugged by a question that I’d like to ask you. You don’t have to answer that, if it is too personal. Also, should it come across hurting womens’ interest in any way or manner, or leave the option to interpret it in a questionable way, I apologize. My purpose of asking this is simply curiosity.

When I was in school, I was the designated Nerd/ weirdo. Nobody would have taken 5 minutes to spend with me. Everyone I came across found me too undesirable. I entered the Uni at 19. I am a first generation immigrant. And now I am 26, ending my Uni, and starting my career as an Executive in a Tech Firm, and starting my Doctoral studies. It wasn’t an easy journey. I have gone through a few incidents, including becoming homeless for a while and so on, all alone.

I new what I wanted from my life since I was 11. I have been working sleeplessly for that. Nevertheless, until I had made the success, no one would have taken the time to “slowly undress” me. Until then, I am a nerd loser.

But as soon as I see success, a number of people pop up, and try to convince me, that I should take my time to “slowly undress” them. As a matter of fact these are the same people, who so far was too busy with other things.

You see, all my life I have wanted to be with someone who would have been with me, even during hard times, and actually had been there during my metamorphosis (If I may use the Term). Seeing this post, nevertheless, I can’t help but wonder, would you have been spending your time in your early 20-s to “slowly undress” someone who is struggling to make a difference with his life? Or would you had been considered him the rather worthless?

Again, you don’t have to answer this, if it comes across wrong.

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