We are, as women, FAR too kind to the psychopaths in our midst. Absolutely, we should be in control of our feelings and actions but they arise out these kinds of threats for a purpose — to protect us, our families and communities.
Far too often, women in particular are shamed for being ‘overly emotional' or accused of being ’hysterical' or 'out of control' when in the same situation men would easily get a pass. It’s being used very effectively to shut down our defences and therefore make us more vulnerable. Highly useful in a culture that wants to control our behaviour.
So, no. I think you acted appropriately. I wish for you a favourable outcome based on this truth.