At some point I wasn’t worth texting anymore.
I wasn’t worth caring about.
I wasn’t worth missing.
I wasn’t worth your time.
You tell me it isn’t me.
But how can that be so?
I mean there must be something that made me expendable.
I am a stupid pathetic idiot who is in love with someone who can live without me. I was never anything. Nor will I be again. I am not important to you.
You think there is better out there.
Better than me.
I was the whole mother fucking bundle.
What did I do wrong?
To lose that title in your heart and mind.
To just give up on me.
I am worth loving.
I don’t want it anymore but I’m worth it.
Did I love too much? Did I make you feel guilty?
I’m sorry.
You aren’t coming back for me. I keep hoping. But you aren’t. Bc I’m not worth it to you. Well maybe someone else will love me. If only I wanted someone else.
Oh well. This is my life. I can’t change it.
I embrace it.
Fuck it. Fuck every guy out there who is going to tell me they love me. I don’t want to hear it from them. I just don’t. Leave me alone.
Oh the ramblings of a substitute teacher who cries on her lunch break like a giant dweeb.