On Being an Adult TCK (Third Culture Kid)
I was first introduced to the term Adult Third Culture Kid (ATCK) one year ago. At age 32, it was the first I’d heard of a word that described my seemingly complicated life — nomadic, international, culturally enriching and sometimes confusing.
On one hand, I loved that the term would save me time explaining myself — I grew up in a culture different from that of my parents, during my developmental years. On the other hand, it only just scratched the surface.
Looking back, it is the experiences and lessons drawn from growing up as a TCK that have shaped my identity and worldview. The term speaks to a lifestyle that many TCKs share but it fails to capture the intercultural dynamics that influence who we become as adults.
As an American-born-Taiwanese-Ethiopian, the socialization process at international schools in Taiwan and Singapore were distinct and defining. Different rules at home and in school meant having to adapt to different worlds on a daily basis.
In Taiwan, my best friends were the ‘Westernized’ Taiwanese kids because we spoke the same (three) languages and understood the dynamics of growing up in the Western and Eastern contexts — at home and in other environments. In Singapore, my best friends were mixes of such amazing diversity, that I couldn’t imagine the world any different. I observed, embraced and absorbed a bit of everything from every culture and experience.
It wasn’t until I went to university in the United States that I recognized the distinct lifestyle and tastes I had become accustomed to. I craved Asian food, house music, and chili sauce all the time. Instead I had to cultivate a taste for ‘beer pong’, hip-hop and cold winters
The notion of ‘career’ was also a confusing one. On the one hand, companies seemed to be seeking candidates with “international experience” and “cross cultural” skills, yet finding the right job was a perennial struggle. And while I’ve always been told my background and language skills would set my career for life, more often these felt undervalued or even misunderstood.
Through my adult years, I’ve grown to a stage where I can laugh every time a Taiwanese person asks me why my skin is so black, in Chinese. I’ve learned to distinguish the look of awe or fascination from a rude glare, which has saved my wavering confidence on more than one occasion. Most importantly, I’ve come to accept myself and my life fully — the awesome, the weird, and even the shadows.
I’ve always identified as a citizen of the world — from everywhere and nowhere; influenced by many cultures but embraced by none. Where others see differences, I often see similarities and through the same lens a clear belief that we are all connected.
Solonia Teodros is the Co Founder of The Change School and curator of the online, year-long Third Culture / Global Citizens Summit — check it out HERE!
*This article was first published for Culture 3 Counsel.
