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If you buy a Kia Soul, jaden violet, you totally can go out in it and have a good time, dancing and hitting the clubs. Of course, you can do that in any car you choose. I like the Kia Soul, too, though it strikes me as a young woman’s car for some reason. I guess because the only people I know who own a Kia Soul are young women. So that’s probably part of the illusion, too. But I think they’re pretty cool.

Actually, I think all the Kias and Hyundais (Hyundai owns Kia, btw) are pretty cool, now that they’ve redesigned every model in the past decade. I drive a Hyundai Santa Fe that I bought brand-new 10 years ago, and it’s about to turn over 190,000 miles. I think I can get 300,000 out of it because it still runs like the day I bought it. If you’re standing outside the car 10 feet away from it, you can’t tell if it’s running. Hell, sometimes in the driver’s seat I can’t tell. More than once I’ve ground the starter because I thought the motor was off and turned the ignition to start it. Driving 90 mph it feels like you’re standing still. Best car I’ve ever owned. It’s also the only car I ever bought that was both brand-new and specifically for me (as opposed to, say, the Kia Sedona I bought new for my wife).

So there you have it — more than anyone could possibly want to know about my automobile purchases, habits and preferences. All exclusive and 100% free of charge. You’re welcome!