A Very Murray Distaster

A Very Murray Christmas was released on Netflix in late December and people were raving about it. Celebs, songs, Christmas, Coppola, and Murray. That’s all I need. I was pumped to watch the hour long special. But then I actually started it and physically felt my life, soul, and creativity being sucked away.

I’m convinced that the only reason the special was even picked up aside from the Coppola/Murray pairing was for the dozens of cameos on paper. How could something this fun go wrong? Unfortunately the plot is lost, the songs are lazy, and no one seems interested in what they’re selling to us? But what is it they’re selling to us? Heck if I know. Christmas? Loneliness? Family? New Traditions?

It begins with a huge storm that shuts down New York City and Bill Murray’s live Christmas show on Christmas Eve. Okay got it, Bill Murray plays himself. Chris Rock plays himself. Miley Cyrus plays herself. George Clooney plays himself. Rashida Jones, you would assume she plays herself? Nah. Jason Schwartzman surely plays himself, right? No. Amy Poehler must play herself? Nem. Explain to me why this special is packed with so many cameos and so little effort! None of the characters mean absolutely anything to this lethargic storyline. It was clear that literally no one wanted to be in the special, considering three characters physically ran out of the story as fast as they could.

The Christmas special is claiming to be a homage to old school variety shows. It is self aware but constantly falls flat from being captivating or entertaining at all. I had to force myself to watch this hour long special. I essentially had to clamp my eyelids open so they wouldn’t close from sheer boredom. I thought maybe, just maybe it’ll get better and it only got worse. Don’t ask me why I didn’t turn it off. I think it’s because I like watching awful things just to then talk about how much I hate them afterward. Maybe I should have been cast in the special, I’m narcissistic enough.

I then automatically thought it was sure to be an anti-Christmas special. Shows how the hoildays can be for those without a family or those suffering with depression or loneliness? I beg to differ. Bill Murray got what he wanted in the ending dream sequence, a huge production, Murray was happy and content in his self-indulgent piece of garbage. There were no jokes, no entertaining tunes, or common thread to pull it all together. As someone that is only 21 and already doesn’t care about SNL, I understood that there are some cute references I missed, but is an hour long special worth it for some “cute references”?

I wonder if you have the show playing in the background while you played a board game or got totally hammered it would be more appealing once the dream sequence came. Maybe Clooney would be endearing and laughable as he creepily hid behind fake trees on a set in Queens. But, I doubt the successfulness of this special since we’ve now entered 2016. The quicker it leaves Netflix and my mind the better off we will all be.

Overall I think Chris Rock, as Chris Rock, said it best, “I gotta get out of here. I got stuff to do. I gotta get home. I gotta build stuff. I gotta build a Malibu Barbie Beach House…Bill I barely know you. I just met you…Why am I here.” But Chris Rock had a much more pleasant fate than those of us watching, with a power outage he snuck out of this Christmas hell hole and went home to do anything else.

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