When you stop asking ‘WHY’ you can just focus on the lessons.

Stacy Small
Aug 28, 2017 · 7 min read

Nearly every single day, I’m bombarded with life lessons. We all are. Some are larger than others, but there are nonstop opportunities for growth every time the need to know why is surpassed by a sense of gratitude. I am constantly being reminded this, at a time in my life when there have been plenty of questions begging for answers. Thankfully, along with the guidance from my coach Nancy Levin, I’ve pushed myself to a place of not needing to question why things are the way they are and into the space of being grateful everything played out exactly as it did.

By trusting that the universe has a bigger, better plan for me than one I temporarily saw as my path, I’ve been able to accept what happened in the past, surrender to what is happening in the present and trust in the law of divine guidance. I’ve found it so much more peaceful not to worry about WHY things happened. Honestly, who cares. Clearly, I had a lot of lessons to learn and thankfully, I’m a quick study. My inner peace has long been a priority, especially after having ill parents for a 12-year stretch where it just wasn’t ever possible to rest in peace. There was always a burning fear of what might happen next. But that was then, this is now. And now, it’s no longer about the why things are happening, but it’s about an inner knowing that I don’t need to know why…I just need to trust and allow my faith to remain bigger than my fear.

A month after moving (somewhat unexpectedly) into my new house, blocks away from the house I loved but also hated due to the annoyingly loud, thoughtless neighbors, I’m no longer asking “Why am I here?”. As much as the move felt disruptive and complicated and didn’t make a ton of sense, I knew I couldn’t question it. It was time to go with the flow, and move. Change is good. Now, I find myself looking around at my beautiful, peaceful, zen-like incredible surroundings with nothing but gratitude.

I am grateful to the universe for guiding me to this funky incredible unique Hawaiian/Japanese cottage-style house in an amazing location. According to every friend who’s recently stopped by to see the new abode, it’s “much more my style”. I think one friend in particular was talking about all of the bamboo and wood and nature elements of the indoor/outdoor setting, and another saw my separate meditation/work space and said “the universe did you a huge favor sending you here.” For a while I was questioning if it was the right move; those questions have been replaced by thoughts of holy shit, I am SO happy to be here and SO grateful for this space. I manifested this (I literally said out loud to a friend days before this house showed up: “The next place I move to needs to have a separate building where I can write and work and do yoga and meditate and chill in peace). That often happens to me; what I say and envision I usually manifest more quickly than I ever expect. Five weeks after nonstop work around here by painters and handymen to turn this space into my version of a peaceful paradise and there’s no question I am exactly where I am supposed to be.

My life is one big series of synchronicities. And this too, is something I no longer question but actually just say thank you for. I LOVE when things happen that almost seem too good to be true, but are actually just perfect because intuitively I often know what I need and meditate on it, visualize it, tell the universe what I am hoping for (after thanking whoever is listening for all that I already have and don’t have). About two weeks ago, I was thinking to myself that I would really like to take my Reiki healing training to the next level. It was on my brain to text my Maui Reiki master and inquire about setting up a private advanced training before the end of the year. The same day, I checked my email and there was one from her advising that she was planning to teach a one-day ART (Advanced Reiki Training) on August 26th if anyone was interested. WHAT? How did she know what was in my head? Who knows. Who cares. The why this all worked out so beautifully means nothing, it’s just all about divine timing.

It’s now 24 hours after I received my Reiki Master certificate and I feel super proud of myself for committing to doing something that I felt called to do without questioning why. A year ago I didn’t even know what Reiki was. I had no clue it was an incredible ancient Japanese healing technique that has been proven to enhance relaxation and lower stress. I surely could have used a lot of reiki during all those stressful years of my crazier life as a nonstop workaholic with sick parents and later, my own serious health issues.

Now, I’m healthier than I’ve ever been after a full year of nearly full-time self-care. Reiki found me, called to me, and guided me to take the advanced training so that I can share my healing gifts with others. I love using it on my dogs to help them chill out at night, and also when I sense they’re not feeling their best. All rescue dogs, mine included, have some built-in level of anxiety and Reiki is an amazing fix that requires nothing but my two hands, my belief in the practice and a little bit of time. It works incredibly well on people going through challenging situations on all levels. I’m still meditating on the best way to gift more people lower stress and higher levels of peace via reiki so watch this space as I have some incredibly cool ideas. My biggest idea is to combine my recent designation as a Travel + Leisure Magazine A-List Hawaii specialist with a really exclusive Maui magical wellness package, featuring one-on-one healing/reiki sessions with me and then a customized week of treatments and sessions from those in my “black book” of Maui’s best of the best in the wellness/healer world. Sort of like a week in my life….Stay tuned.

This life of mine is what it is because I created it. No one handed any of this peaceful, joy-filled Maui magic to me on a silver platter. I was no longer enjoying the fast pace of city life on either coast (tried both twice) and I was getting sicker (literally). Something had to give, and it did. I no longer question why I got diagnosed with mono in 2014 or why I had to switch doctors and get on a multi-year plan to kick toxicity out of my system. Last week, for the first time in over three years, I received a clean bill of health (as in normal to below-normal levels of nearly everything including mercury) and just a recommendation to stick to a program of low stress, little travel for a while longer, an anti-inflammatory detox diet and just more of whatever brings me peace and joy. At the end of the day, that’s what it is all about. We only have limited time here so why not make it fun?

More than ever, I believe we can always #ChooseJoy. Questioning why things happen to us is wasted energy…it truly doesn’t matter. Not when you accept and surrender to your situation, put your own peace at the top of your priority list, forgive those who aren’t able to do the same. Doing so is tantamount to learning from mistakes (which are proof we are trying) and growing from the lessons. Nothing feels better than inspiring others to do the same as you lead by example, learn and grow and become a better, happier, healthier version of yourself. Don’t get tripped up in the WHY, just know that everything truly does happen for a reason. I’m living proof of this.

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Stacy Small

Written by

Founder/CEO: Elite Travel International. Author: WHYNOTME?!?: 12 Lessons a Year on an Island Taught Me About Living My Dreams. 🏝🌈💗

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