Unapologetic Personal Power

Many of the guiding principles of my life have been developed by navigating super sucky situations and then recovering by GIVING MYSELF TIME to process the situations.

For me, processing involves journaling the raw facts, reflecting on my native reactions, and then — to the best of my ability — coming up with my own original concepts and theories that will help guide me through the next go-around with that little test of fate. Surely you know it’s bound to repeat itself until there is nothing left to learn. Ahem…

Here we go.

My 10 Guiding Principles for Personal Power.

1. Always be cultivating three things for life balance: the ability to discriminate, to love passionately, and to remain indifferent.

2. Recognize that the ability to express wonder and amazement in this world is a rare and dying quality — you must protect your wholesomeness in order to keep it.

3. Resolutely believe in the creative power of your mind to turn your thoughts into reality, and to do so using the black-and-white rules of physics that rule the universe.

4. Once you have decided to take an action or make a powerful decision, there is no emotional voting on it afterward.

5. Maintain a super-reserve of mental and emotional space within you in order to give generously while never being taken advantage of.

6. Have the balls to make a strong case for what you want, which is preceded by having the balls to figure it out within yourself first.

7. Bypass improving and go straight to evolving. Persistent problems are to be suspected as questions asked in the wrong way. Execute a power move (I can teach you how).

8. Never discuss sex or money on the first date, and don’t accept an invitation for a second date standing on the street, saying good-bye. Sleep on it. (metaphor for everything in your life, Superfox).

9. Despise the free lunch. It’s a trap.

10. When reduced to staggering fear, loneliness, or self-pity, the best remedy is to pick a bigger problem — ideally one that shoves you out into the world and solves someone else’s dilemma.

Do any of these speak to you? Well, if you were especially intrigued by #1, #5, and #8, I’d like to introduce you to one of the most important assets you can have: Liberated Attention.

Liberated attention is having a super-reserve of mental and emotional space which gives you the power to connect with and influence the outcomes of your circumstances.

Attention is like having oxygen. And if you are huffing and puffing with mental noise, you have more CO2 in your veins that life-giving oxygen, metaphorically speaking. This creates a condition in your life that’s much like holding your breath under water. You are a bit panicked, making flash judgments and decisions, and reacting to preserve your survival.

Retaining liberated attention is like having plenty of fresh, clean air to breathe. It acts as quiet source of power and confidence and makes other people curious about you.

How do you know when you have it?

Well, most of the time:

• Your mind feels peaceful and clear.

• You are attractive, magnetic, and influential to the world due to being in a non-desperate state.

• You have the ability to discriminate, to love passionately, and to remain indifferent — three different qualities you have at your disposal and are practiced at.

• You calmly coordinate your efforts in a way that would be most effective for yourself, others, and the situation, instead of flash-reacting.

You are probably intuiting that having this default disposition comes from a very clarified and centered sense of self. And that it takes time and doing one’s homework to be this kind of person. You are correct!

If you’d like to learn how to come from that strong, peaceful center, good news! I’ve taught a workshop on it. It’s immediately downloadable and comes with step-by-step exercises that will give you noticeable results immediately. Check out Like Bees to Honey: Cultivating the Superfoxy Allure of Liberated Attention.

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Are you into stuff like this? I write about modern spirituality, love, communication, generosity, and how to run a sustainable small business (while keeping your sanity). Put yourself on the list and you’ll never miss and article or a workshop. xo

Originally published at stephaniestclaire.com.