I agree with what Shelly says here. The idea is to find someone to complement your life not complete it… or fix it. As a relationship coach I use to recommend looking at the relationship as a separate entity that each partner was responsible for feeding and nurturing with their unique set of gifts and offering. The individuals evolve and change and so does the relationship. Being able to ask the question “what does this relationship need to feel robust and whole?” — is often a great place to start a truthful dialog. It allows each person to offer their contribution from right where they are. It gives the opportunity to feed the mutually created entity without sacrificing individuality.
My husband and I just celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary. I didn’t know I could love him more now then I did 10 years. And I love our relationship more too!