Getting There

A Book of Mentors

Growing up, most people have role models they take cues from, often those closest to them: family, teachers, friends. Our social environment at a young age undeniably shapes the type of people we become, for better or for worse. But assuming one successfully navigates the labyrinth of childhood and adolescence, emerging on the other side a reasonably well-balanced adult, it can often be difficult finding new role models to guide our ambitions, people who understand our desires and can give practical advice for how to channel them into success. This is what makes Gillian Zoe Segal’s book Getting There such a treasure: it is a trove of worldly wisdom from successful and happy people of all walks of life, providing all the inspiration and guidance an ambitious soul could hope for.

I may be biased. Throughout my young adult years I always felt as though I was in search of an especially charismatic and wise person I could latch onto and glean the formula for success from. No matter how hard I tried, however, life always seemed to have other plans and I would wind up figuring things out for myself (a blessing in disguise, perhaps). While I have encountered some mentors along my path, no single person has offered the amount of insight that Segal’s collection of stories did; it was exactly what I have been looking for.

An Anthology of Success

Getting There is a compendium of anecdotes from successful people recounting their path to accomplishment and sharing lessons they learned along the way. The book includes contributions from business executives, entrepreneurs, artists, writers, scientists, NGO managers, chefs, educators, models, architects, and lawyers, to name a few. Each person boils his or her journey down to around 15 pages and ends with concise “pearls” he or she believes to be of particular importance. Common among all stories is a measure of success, primarily in the forms of financial achievement, social impact, prestigious station, and life satisfaction. The similarities between each account hint at universal secrets to success, and their differences make each one uniquely compelling. A lot of times the sections I thought would be boring or irrelevant to my interests proved to be the most inspiring.

Coming from more humble origins I have always felt slightly ostracized from the upper echelons of society; consequently, a big part of what I look for in mentors is the confidence to play by my own rules and not be intimidated by the status quo. I feed off of comments like “I rarely ask people for advice or permission when I’m planning on doing something I feel strongly about.” If Andersen Cooper followed his own lead, why can’t I? I also put a strong emphasis on the importance of balance, and I consider those who are able to successfully pursue career, family, and personal interests as next-level human beings. So it is reassuring when Stacey Snider, co-chairman of 20th Century Fox, asserts that “it’s important to approach the personal aspects of life with as much urgency as we do our careers.” Getting There is an anthology of success with enough breadth to resonate with just about anyone, regardless of what it is you are searching for.

Pearls of Wisdom

John Paul Dejoria grew up in Los Angeles with a single parent and relatively little money. Since he could not afford college, he took on a series of jobs in various industries, including door-to-door encyclopedia salesman. While working at Time, Inc., he was informed by his boss that because he lacked a college degree he would be ineligible for executive management for almost a decade, so he left to work as a salesman in the beauty industry, where there were no such limitations. He excelled at his work and single-handedly generated exponential growth for his employers, but he was ultimately fired from each job, once for making too much money and twice for “not fitting in.” It was only then that he started entertaining the prospect of starting a hair-care product company with his friend Paul Mitchell. Together they formed John Paul Mitchell Systems, and Dejoria went on to become one of the wealthiest people in America, with a $4 billion fortune.

If John initially had the resources to attend college, he never would have worked as an encyclopedia salesman; if he had not sold encyclopedias, he would have lacked the skills necessary to break into the beauty industry; if his bosses had not fired him for a lack of formal education and not fitting into company culture, he never would have changed industries; and without the contacts he made in the beauty industry, it would have been impossible to get John Paul Mitchell Systems off the ground. “I’ve come to realize that things that appear to be setbacks at the time often end up being for the best,” says Dejoria, echoing one of the exact same lessons repeated by other contributors to the book.

When one person tells you something, it is only natural to be skeptical; when 30 accomplished people unintentionally repeat the same sentiment, it is time to sit up and take notes. Below are just a few of the pearls of wisdom reiterated throughout Getting There:

• Continue your education as long as you live
• Take advantage of nascent technologies
• Have a passion for your venture; otherwise you will not have the stamina to endure hard times
• Failure is part of the process
• Few valuable things are possible without a good team
• Learn from criticism while not letting it get to you (“you can’t please everybody”)
• Networking is important
• Creatives cannot rest on their laurels
• Pay it forward and pass on what you learn

Just as rewarding are the unique insights each individual offers. Most not only hail from separate industries but also come from entirely different social, economic, and educational backgrounds. Their particular set of life experiences position them to dispense advice others might never consider:

• “I don’t follow the adage that it’s not good to do business with friends. I think it is good. It’s nice to share success with a friend, and a friendship can help resolve difficulties that might arise. But it’s important to choose a partner who complements your skill set rather than someone who excels at the same things you do.” (Ian Schrager, hotelier & real estate developer)
• “It’s important to put the idea of dying in your daily life because it helps you to appreciate your existence on this planet. Death can come at any second and change everything. It can be the death of a loved one or your own. People spend endless time on total insanity, thinking that they will be here forever. Life is temporary. Make every day meaningful and don’t spend time on bullshit.” (Marina Abramović, artist)
• “Discouraging remarks will likely take you off course. You’ll either end up deflated or spend your time defending your idea instead of going for it. I worked on Spanx until I felt I had enough of myself invested that I wouldn’t turn back regardless of what I heard.” (Sara Blakely, Spanx inventor)
• “People see me in action at a trial and think I’m good at seizing moments extemporaneously — but what they don’t see is the tremendous amount of work I’ve done to prepare. I can only take advantage of opportunities when they arise at trial because of all the time I’ve spent getting ready.” (David Boies, lawyer)
• “Many people have huge delusions or are very misinformed about science. It’s really just trying to answer questions about life that nobody knows the answer to. It’s trying to figure out how things work so you can fix them. That’s all.” (J. Craig Venter, scientist)
• “The lesson is: don’t automatically be intimidated by people who have achieved more professional success than you, and don’t let your own insecurity bog you down. Move upward if you have the opportunity. Once you have the chance to survey the lay of the land, things are often not as hard to tackle as you might have imagined, and the people you assumed were so smart might not be.” (Leslie Moonves, CBS president & CEO)
• “For me, what I do is not about fitness. It’s about helping people rebuild their lives. Fitness is just the tool I use to empower them. By helping people feel healthy, strong, and capable, I’m able to redefine their entire self-image and transform years of negativity.” (Jillian Michaels, fitness expert)
• “Understanding how you are being stereotyped is the first step in remedying it. There have been times, for example, when I’ve realized that someone was not treating me as an equal because I am a woman. Feeling like a victim leads to victim behavior. Addressing an issue restores your power.” (Helene Gayle, Care USA president and CEO)
• “I have an old message from a guy framed and hung on my office wall. It says: ‘I’ll call back on Monday.’ It was a Friday when he called and left that message with my secretary. On Sunday night, the guy died of a heart attack. He was only thirty-four. Monday never came. Monday doesn’t always come. Whether ‘Monday’ is ten years from now or tomorrow, you may not have the chance to do the things you say you will sometime down the road.” (Jim Kotch, founder of the Boston Beer Company)

This is just a fraction of the insightful and inspiring content throughout the book. When taken in the context of each person’s struggle, perseverance, and eventual triumph, each piece of advice assumes an even greater depth of meaning.

The Great Differentiator

There is a reason why success literature repeatedly claims attitude to be the great differentiator: People with the right one have the resiliency and doggedness to overcome any obstacle and proactively solve any problem. That is what makes a book like Getting There so important: while it may not impart a technical skill or explain away a part of the physical world, it empowers people to approach their lives without fear, giving them “permission” to embrace their most authentic selves and feel free in how they approach challenges. I believe that is all a person needs to experience overwhelming satisfaction in his or her life. Once you are empowered and courageous, everything else is just ammunition for the soul.