I Feel Lost…

This is what yesterday’s post was about. I was trying to reassure myself.

I was telling myself I knew what I was doing. I was telling myself I was actually doing something with my life.

But, today, I feel like those were lies. I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing with my life. I feel like I just suck.

I feel terribly undeveloped.

I feel scared. I feel terrified. I feel like I don’t know where I am in life. I feel kinda depressed, too. I feel like I’m standing on a very loose bridge, you know those ones over ravines that always break when the heroes walk on them in cartoons. I feel like I can fall at any second.

I’m not going to do any sort of thinking over this. I’m just letting go. Letting the emotion course through my body.

A sort of ball is starting to form in my stomach.

This is what’s happening right now.

This is what’s been happening for a while but I’ve been running from it by doing stuff.

More tension is building in my stomach. I’m also getting a headache. And I’m tired as fuck, even though I’ve slept 9 hours last night.

I’ll be enjoying this.