Why are you still single?

The infamous line that all women and some men 21+ get asked when they have “yet” to meet “the one.”

First, let me just say that I really don’t believe that there’s only one person in this world for you. Just like the Cinderella story, if that were true than I’ve had several “ones” hahaaa …..yeah we’re gonna leave that for the movies lol

So at 24 years old, I can honestly say that I finally know what I want/deserve from a potential mate. It has taken many failed attempts, horrible dates, one that I thought was forevvvver (we all have one) and then ME, really understanding my value as a woman. However, let’s dispel a few myths first:

  • Being single does not mean you can’t get a date. (Getting a date is easy, finding someone who you can connect with beyond social media talk isn’t)
  • Single doesn’t equal something’s wrong with Him/Her
  • Self-control isn’t impossible
  • Being single isn’t a disease or sign for instant “awws” (we good bruh, I promise)

I’ve had several opportunities this year to be boo’d up, and photo-op ready with bae via Insta, but too bad those aren’t #goals for ya girl. I didn’t always think this way, but in the age where effort has become texting, and sex is almost demanded if you even decide to go on a first date…at some point you have to draw the line. Like anyone, I’ve had moments where I’ve felt the pressure to have someone, and acted out of desperation smh..and each time it’s led to me having to remind myself that diamonds are found, not given away. It’s in those moments where my daily talks with God come in handy..okay! BUT seriously, take time to remember that God knows your desires and promises to honor them and I promise you….you gon’ be alright!

So, I’ve put my looking to a halt (i still have eyes though lol). That’s right no double-tapping pics on Insta, y’all know what I’m talking about…but instead just focusing on my three jobs (literally) + counting + Grad school (MSW coming soon) or else your girl will be out here going throuuuuugh it.

Your life is so much more that having someone else around to validate the love that God has already shown you. Do I desire marriage?Yes. Am I focusing all of my attention on attracting someone? No.

I still believe in love, but I also believe God knows what best for me. Whether it’s tomorrow, or ten years from now, just like the call on my life, I have to let God be God, and direct that show..no interruptions from me needed. So there you have it! am I single?…very much so, but I truly believe that one day the MAN (cause it’s a lot boys outchea lol) God has for me, and me for them (okaaay), will pursue me with Christlike love + intention, and we’ll fulfill our purpose with marriage..but right now I need to make sure that my life and my character, are aligned with who God has called me to be and then some…so I’ll continue doing the following things:

  • exploring more places (i.e museums, galleries, lakes, trails)
  • putting my personal library on display in my home when I finally move
  • writing, writing, and more writing
  • living life off of social media
  • spending time with my cute nephew + family
  • traveling the world some mo’ :)
  • meeting new sister-friends

Love you all, and know that you are beautiful + loved…just the way YOU are single or happily taken.


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