Kevin Durant May Be Pulling The Wool Over Our Eyes | KD & The Brooklyn Multiverse

Maybe it’s the absence of juicy headlines in the NBA. Maybe it’s the continuous developments on the Nets/KD situation. Maybe it’s the 300 mg edible running through my system right now. OR maybe it’s all three combined. It’s definitely all three combined.

Regardless, I believe that there is strong evidence pointing to Kevin Durant circulating rumors about his situation in Brooklyn with no actual plans of leaving the team anytime soon. Okay, maybe “strong evidence” is a stretch. But I’m begging you to stick with me for just a few minutes.

Kevin Durant is a Twitter troll

KD is one of the most online personalities in the NBA. There’s a clip somewhere on the internet of KD walking back to the locker room in Brooklyn after a massive win. Instead of celebrating or whooping it up with his teammates, the video shows KD sitting down, and immediately opening up the Twitter app.

He’s quick to respond to tweets about him, no matter if the person has a million followers or 19. So it would make sense that he would want to get his name circulating during the off season. Not to mention the fact that whenever KD news breaks, it’s always in the middle of slow news days which is a little too convenient to not be orchestrated.

Don’t quit on me yet. I promise I’m getting to the a point.

The Nets’ Trade Demands Are Bonkers

During this KD/Nets saga, there is one common denominator that ends all trade talks between the Nets and the interested team. It’s the ludicrous trade demands that the Nets are asking for. They want every draft pick for the next five years, an entire starting five, and the first born son of every player in exchange for Durant. They’re approaching this situation as if they’re Sacha Baron Cohan in The Dictator.

Sure, KD is one of the best basketball players in the world right now, but he’s not worth even half of what they are trying to get in return for him. The only logical reason? The Nets’ front office is in on the joke. They know that they aren’t getting rid of KD, but they think that if they throw out these asinine demands, they will either be laughed at, or, they may just strike gold with one of the trades actually going through.

Almost there, I promise.

It’s unreasonable to think that KD is just some egomaniac who is willing to start rumors just to see his name in the headlines. Also, it wouldn’t make sense for the Nets organization to support that type of behavior. So how does any of this make sense?

Well, here it is.

Durant & The Nets Are Looking For Revenge

Durant is known to be a spiteful player. If someone talks shit, he’s going to put a 50 piece on your head and call you his son after he’s done. He likes to get his revenge on the court. So chances are he saw what the world was saying after getting swept in the first round of the playoffs to the C*ltics.

Everyone expected him to be able to take down the entire Boston organization by himself. And when he didn’t do that, we immediately jumped on the “KD is washed” bandwagon.

Do we really think he didn’t see that?

So instead of responding right away to the haters and trolls online, KD cooked up a master plan that will allow him to get his revenge once and for all.

The Master Plan

KD stirred up rumors about Kyrie wanting a trade. Then followed that up with his own “KD demands a trade” rumors. Like a one-two punch, he watched everyone’s reaction to the news.

Then another headline. “KD doesn’t want to play with Kyrie and Ben”. Which I can’t believe for once second. Kyrie is regarded as the hardest player to guard in the league, and KD doesn’t think Ben Simmons is just some schmuck. At this point, nearly every NBA fan is saying the same thing.

The Brooklyn Nets are a dumpster fire.

Which is exactly the type of narrative that Kevin Durant would want right before he returns to Brooklyn for a full, healthy season with Kyrie Irving & Ben Simmons and wins another NBA Finals. And the moment he starts raising his second Finals MVP trophy, he’s going to tell the world to suck on his nuts.

Thanks for following along. I can’t wait to read this when I’m sober.

Follow me on Twitter : @cha_boi_noah