What If I Murdered a Tory

So as a little thought experiment, I thought I’d be brave and discuss the possible outcome if I or someone else snuffed out a Tory. This is not a promotion nor a suggestion that we should go around slaughtering Tories, so relax it’s not evil scheme to end your pathetic miserable stain of existence. This piece is just a “what if,” nothing more.

So it’s a day after I murdered a non-descript Tory of low importance. Assuming I haven’t been shot dead by police out of petty retaliation despite being no threat to them, I would be understandly arrested. In my trial, I would be found guilty and I’d never see the outside again, even though more dangerous murders get much less and are out in no time. Some lives are of more importance after all.

The Conservative party would be hit by a massive wave of unsurprised shock throughout its membership. They would be sad, angry and paranoid but not surprised. They’ll pretend to be but they won’t be. They aren’t clueless incompetents, they know fully what they’ve done to people. They know their reforms like Universal Credit and all the Disability cuts are intrinsically designed to ruin people’s lives. They want to keep people in poverty, keep wages low and keep the population in a state of abused obedient docility. It logically follows that people killing themselves or dying of neglect (homelessness, the inability to afford to keep healthy) is a positive outcome of reform, the fewer low classed humans around the better. But they also know that someone with nothing left to lose are potentially dangerous, and so are the angry but grieving left behind family.

When I saw the Tories out campaigning in public in the last election (in a safe seat no less), they were all completely terrified, to the point I think I could smell the stench of fear off of them. There was no reasonable threat to them so why the terror? If I were to take a guess it was because Jo Cox was murdered a year ago, even though she was a Labour MP killed by a Nazi because she stood up for refugees. It hit too close to home for them, and a guilty conscience creates a paranoid mind set. To be honest, it’s very lucky that the Tories rule over a society that somehow is in nature, one part greedy and barbaric, and the other, kind, soft and pacifistic. A perfect society for the bullying wealthy classes to sink their fangs into the rest without barely a whimper.

If one of them actually did get murdered, the Tories’ fury will know no bounds, and they will lash out everywhere but they’ll also be opportunistic about it. Laws will be passed to curb freedoms, especially on the internet, there will be more surveillance of the public, any opposition group to the Tories would face increased policing attempts or outright banning, they will also use it as an excuse to increase gerrymandering of elections.

Lastly, they will viciously attack the poor in both a new wave of cuts but also the removal of the last remaining dignities we have left. They’ll move up their plans to copy the US; food stamps, drug tests, no healthcare, and GPS monitoring bracelets will be used, amongst other horrible new laws. Workfare programmes would be rapidly expanded and I wouldn’t be surprised if brutality, like out right assault, ended up being permitted to teach “character”.

Their murdered MP would be martyred and used as a stick to attack Labour and others, even if I, the killer, has nothing to do with anyone else. The Tories would be free to say things like “ Gas the Chavs” but you saying “fuck off” to a harassing Tory would be considered abuse of the highest order, perhaps even a death threat because see a violent lefty killed one of them, so everyone on the left is a violent subhuman. (Let’s face it the right act like that already but since they have the higher murder rate and have no examples other than ancient history like “Stalin” or “Mao” to draw upon, their screeching falls flat.)

The British Media would be ghoulishly ecstatic at the prospect of a murdered Tory. They will tear my character to pieces, the articles would concentrate on my scrounger-hood, on how I’m a burden to the taxpayer, they will call me scum, a filthy chav, find some mundane thing I once did (or make something up completely) to paint me as having “a history of violence”.

Pseudo-academic charlatans like Dr Adam Perkins PhD and Toby Young will be celebratory as they get invited on nearly every platform to declare it was inevitable I’d kill due to my genetic, innate from birth, violent tendencies because all Working Class People are viewed as thuggish unfeeling unthinking lumps by the wealthy.

Newspaper columnists will push for the legal sterilization of the poor, promote behavioural re-education of the poor, promote fascist vigilante acts against the poor and I wouldn’t be surprised to see them flirt over the line of outright genocide that they currently barely keep locked in a draw.

Only maybe somewhere like the Guardian (a very maybe) would a journalist seek to write about me with more nuance than portraying me like nothing more than an animal. I doubt it would be satisfactory and despite that, showing even a slither of sympathy towards me would attract horrendous amount of abuse of the journalist, from Right-Wingers, that they wouldn’t be able to escape or recover from.

There will be no real discussion of what could have drove me into committing such a horrible act. They won’t or barely mention such potential factors like the bullying from the DWP, the inability of accessing money (sanctions, cuts, caps and errors), my homelessness, or me finding the body of a sick loved one, dead by suicide because they were found fit to work.

I will be nothing more than a savage out of control chavvy animal. The Nazi, Thomas Mair would have had more sympathetic coverage than what I would get.

The media certainly won’t discuss the systematic issues that gave rise to the deadly Conservative regime in the first place. They won’t observe that Britain’s Class system works to keep people, aside from a few tokens, in the position they’re supposed born for. If you’re born in the gutter, you’re supposed to die in the gutter. If you’re born to rule, you’re born to rule even if you like sexual intercourse with dead pigs or much worse.

Oh they’ll talk about Social Mobility and Meritocracy but it’s all a bunch of crap. The jobs aren’t there and the Middle Classes will viciously guard and attack you for the few remaining chairs in this rigged game of musical chairs. The truth is, if you’re poor and try to get above your station, the gatekeepers of the Middle Class will attempt to destroy you thoroughly and without mercy. They’ll look at you like dirt, imply you are of low intelligence, undermine you at work- if you have the audacity to get the job, they’ll put your CV in the bin- even if it’s shining, they’ll tell you, you haven’t got enough experience but they’ll hire a Middle Class school leaver with feck all, insult you on the phone for half an hour, call security on you in an interview, and even harass you out of any volunteering field that’s perceived for the wealthy only.

So not enough jobs, an abusive classist society and a cruel ruling class push people into an impossible situation that they have no control over, doubly so if you are sick or disabled.

But the above issues don’t exist in Right-Wing fairy-tale land (worse than the sanitized Disney version) and I’m just an unfeeling animalistic violent monster with no understandable motive.

The Middle Classes would likely get swayed by the out pouring of grief for the murdered Tory, they will swing more back in favour for the Tories like the 2015 election. Shy centrist Tories would have their perfect excuse to jump ship more openly, after all, the left has proven itself violent and uncivilized and so cannot be supported and so they have been “made” and “forced” to vote Tory.

If it’s out of sight, dealt out via paperwork and no scene of nasty gruesome bloodiness is present, then it is not considered a violent act. It’s clean and civilized so where’s the violence, they think. All those people who have suffered, “they must have did something wrong, behaved badly even, if they followed the rules, they would be okay”. “Those stats are lies, those who took their lives just have mystifying unexplainable mental issues.” “They’re obviously lying about their situation, their disabilities, their problems. Laziness, bootstraps etc. “

But the truth is, British society and politics is abusive, cruel and out right evil. Your hands are bloody even if you don’t know your victims, never even heard their names or seen their faces. While I don’t believe in a just world, violence often has consequences, you can claim innocence all you like but I’ve seen retribution, but not justice, creep up on people who have done horrendous things.