Absolutely! I don’t think Dirk was “perfect” or “imperfect,” and frankly I get tired of the fandom constantly arguing over characters in such standards. Dirk is who Dirk is, the story is what it is, the story likely *wants* us to see characters as “good” and “bad,” but ultimately they are just doing what anyone would do in their circumstances.
I absolutely love this, and I am inclined to be convinced by your points. Jake’s views of Dirk, and the miscommunication that follow, echo John’s relationship with his Dad — they latch onto fantasies which their guardians cater to even though the kids secretly aren’t too sure if they really agree with the fantasies. (See: John and harlequins)