Thoughts

It has been such a long time since I put pen to paper, slightly distracted and amused by shoppers shopping as though the end of the world is upon us, an excellent way to describe Christmas!

I find the idea of rushing round anywhere quite distasteful and annoying, the idea of rushing round shopping is appalling to say the least. It is a complete waste of good energy and can be done in comfort at home with a rather nice cup of tea, a few clicks here and there online and it is all done before you can say Jack Frost!

Planning for Christmas always starts around the beginning of October, normally by the third week in October all the food and drink has been chosen and is ready to order shortly after that.

Then all I need to worry about is the little extras I will need nearer to the time, that will see me through till Tuesday when most shops will reopen and will be back to normal until New Year’s Eve.

It’s a very busy time for me as I will be at hospital two days running (28th & 29th) attending clinics that I really need to go too, tomorrow I have to see my GP for my fortnightly check up, when my health declines it does so with no warning so we have to keep on top of it, it can be tiresome at times but is a lifesaver so it is worth it.

Back in April I had quite a big stroke which at the time caused all sorts of problems, most of those have now gone but the heart remains a very serious problem that cannot be fixed so I have to be a little careful.

My GP has a wonderful sense of humour which helps a lot, the hospital does not and does not really appreciate my dry sense of humour, I can live with that; the important thing to remember here is my life is on my terms and not theirs. That’s the way it has to be, it is my way of coping and dealing with quite a complicated maze.

I understand better than anyone that at some point soon my heart will stop and it is more than likely that it wont start again, at the same time I cannot wrap myself up in cotton wool and hope for the best, it does not work like that. I would do myself a disservice if I looked at it in any other way.

I might well be well past my sell by date but there is still life in the old boy yet! I have never given up and never intend too, life is far to precious for that, it always will be. I never sought recognition and chose deliberately to walk that path, mayhap I was not as silly as first thought.