How can you see it if you don’t make it obvious?
This is one of the essential rules of improvement and behavior change. Do you want why you always forget to take your vitamins? Or why you don’t eat those healthy apples that you just bought? There is an obvious reason behind all this.
Obvious But Unexplainable Cues.
There is an obvious reason behind all this, however, I will start this article with what is not obvious. I will quote the following story from the book Atomic Habits by James Clear. Chapter 4: The Man Who Didn’t look Right.
The psychologist Gary Klein once told me a story about a woman who attended a family gathering. She had spent years working as a paramedic and, upon arriving at the event, took one look at her father-in-law and got very concerned.
“I don’t like the way you look,” she said.
Her father-in-law, who was feeling perfectly fine, jokingly replied, “Well, I don’t like your looks, either.”
“No,” she insisted. “You need to go to the hospital now.”
A few hours later, the man was undergoing lifesaving surgery after an examination had revealed that he had a blockage to a major artery and was at immediate risk of a heart attack. Without his daughter-in-law’s intuition, he could have died.
Intuition will provide guidance, but the reasons are not obvious. At the first sight, seems to be just an assumption — a piece of information that is accepted as true or as certain, without proof. But looking deeper into the story above, we can find something true. The human brain is in a constant state of unconscious awareness that predicts possible situations. Just like you try guessing your opponent's moves when playing chess, but those are conscious actions. Unconscious awareness is the intuition one builds up through years of experience in a specific field. The ability to understand something intuitively, without recourse to conscious reasoning.
If the major arteries are obstructed, the body will focus on sending blood to critical organs and away from peripheral locations near the skin’s surface. This results in changing the distribution pattern of the blood in the face. After years of working with patients with heart failure, the woman had unconsciously developed the ability to recognize this pattern. Even though she couldn’t say what it was, she knew something was wrong.
I’ve experienced similar situations. With my vast knowledge of persuasion, I usually find myself understanding what one feels in a given situation, even though I only have vague proof behind it. I know when someone tries to persuade me, but here I usually have strong proof to back it up. But sometimes I know something is wrong with the present behavior of a person, even though, at first sight, seems just a meaningless cue. I know it because I unconsciously learn specific behavior patterns for each individual I meet. It starts with the first impression, and within enough time, I build up a picture of the individual. If something seems out of the picture, I will know it. This doesn’t mean that I’m always right. But it seems like I mostly am.
Whenever you experience something repeatedly… your brain begins noticing what is important, sorting through the details and highlighting the relevant cues, and cataloging that information for future use. — James Clear, Atomic Habits
With enough practice, you will be able to detect cues that predict certain outcomes without having to think about it. Your brain automatically encodes the lessons learned through experience. However, this is another double-edged sword.
Invisible Cues And Awareness.
Have you ever asked yourself, why every time you go in the kitchen you find yourself opening the fridge even though you came for a cup of tea? I’m guilty of this habit more than anyone else. My brain learned that the fridge might have a reward for me, like chocolate or a bottle of soda. Surprisingly, this habit persisted even after I moved alone. I decided at one point that I would only keep food that required at least 20 minutes of preparation time. I made this decision because I was overeating. Even so, I was still opening the fridge for no obvious purpose. This time though, there wasn't anything to eat. But I still do it. The cue was still there, so the cue triggered the response without even realizing it. Surprising about our habits is that: we don’t need to be aware of the cue for a habit to begin.
You are much more than your conscious self. — James Clear, Atomic Habits
The eradication of bad behaviors starts with awareness. As I previously said, I noticed that I was eating too much(awareness). Then I looked for a solution. If I still had rewards in my fridge, the behavior will still continue. But after I eradicated every food that I could just pick up and eat, I stopped eating so much. I always have to spend at least 20 minutes in the kitchen to be able to eat. Sometimes, a trip to the grocery store adds up. Even though the habit of opening the fridge still happens from time to time, is harmless now. I will automatically open it, look inside, see no quick snack, and close it. I just waste a couple of seconds. If you want to be sure you don’t forget to take your vitamins, keep them somewhere visible. No wonder you don’t eat your apples if they are hidden in the back of the fridge.
The more automatic a behavior becomes, the less likely we are to think about it. And overlooking things becomes natural. This is why we need to become as aware as possible of our actions.
A good trick is to make a list of your habits. Write every habit you do daily. Things like:
- Wake up
- Turn the alarm off
- Check my notifications
- Check my crypto wallet
- Check my emails
- Getting out of the bed
- Go to the bathroom
- Brush my teeth
- Get dressed
…and so on.
That was my list. I noticed some bad behaviors, and I eradicated them. A friend of mine, also a crypto investor, said that he deleted the Binance app from his phone because every morning he will automatically check his status. He became aware that his behavior was causing him anxiety. So, he found a way to stop it. He didn’t delete his account, he just removed the app. The account is intact and can be accessed anytime from his computer. But accessing it from the computer requires a little more effort. He added a lot of friction against this habit just by removing the app from his phone. For those who don’t know, accessing a Binance account from a web browser requires a username, password, and two-factor authentication. You can also log in by scanning a QR code with your phone. But in any case, there is enough friction for him to stop this bad behavior. I noticed that my habit of checking my phone every morning wasn’t good. So, I just moved my phone away from the bed. I usually place it on my desk, so I will have to get out of the bed and walk to grab it.
Those simple questions can help you identify the nature of a habit.
Does this behavior help me become the type of person I wish to be? Does this habit cast a vote for or against my desired identity?
Ask yourself those questions every time you don’t know if a habit is good or bad for you. Yes, I want to be a crypto millionaire, but checking my status every morning won’t help me.
Final Words
I write every article, including this one, in the hope that it might help someone.
This article was inspired from Atomic Habits by James Clear, chapter four. You can find my article about the previous three chapters here.
I hope you have found this material informative and valuable. I’d appreciate feedback from you. See you next time. Till then, don’t forget:
- With enough practice, you will be able to detect cues that predict certain outcomes.
- You are much more than your conscious self.
- The eradication of bad behaviors starts with awareness.
- Does this habit cast a vote for or against me?
- Make your desired habit obvious.
- Make your unwanted habits invisible.
- Brush your teeth.
Thanks for reading,
Andrei Boghiu (Shadow)
Stay Strong!
This article is for informational purposes only, it should not be considered financial, tax, legal, or health advice. Consult a professional before making any major decisions. You are in charge of any of your actions.
