The Racist Party

The Real Jim Shady
7 min readFeb 4, 2017

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I haven’t written much lately because, frankly, what is there to say, really? But a recent piece in the Huffington Post caught my eye. The brief essay by Natalie Jackson, entitled “Most Americans Think Donald Trump Is Meeting Their Expectations” analyzes some of the polling data taken at the end of President Trump’s second week in office. There’s nothing particularly shocking in the article. Trump performs as most people expect him to, so on the whole I’m not particularly surprised by any of Jackson’s findings. She’s a thoughtful and straightforward writer, but I have to admit that the following sentence sent me into what I have come to refer to as my Rebellious Raging self:

Views of Trump’s performance are split along partisan lines. Republicans overwhelmingly view his first two weeks in a positive light: 83 percent say he’s doing as they expected in a good way, and another 6 percent say he’s surprised them in a good way.

Wow! What can I say? Nothing helpful, really. I mean, the (occasionally) calm, charming, clever, and witty Jim, Ph.D. that I worked to imagine into being in the mid-1990s when I was attempting to become a rational adult finds himself at a loss for words. Rebellious Raging Jim, on the other hand, has a lot to say. Charming Jim has left the building. The Giant Green Rage Monster will be here for a while.

Jim Smash!

According to www.whitehouse.gov , POTUS has signed eight executive orders so far. The one that strikes me as particularly troubling — or I should say — the one that strikes me as the MOST troubling is the “EXECUTIVE ORDER: PROTECTING THE NATION FROM FOREIGN TERRORIST ENTRY INTO THE UNITED STATES”

Yeah. That one. The one that prohibits visas and cancels green cards from those who hail from Iraq, Syria, Iran, Libya, Somalia, Sudan, and Yemen (I added the Oxford comma, btw, the White House either sees Sudan and Yemen as a team like Abbot and Costello, or they don’t understand grammar). These are majority Muslim countries, of course, and the President has subsequently stated that he’ll give preferential treatment to Christian refugees coming from these areas.

So there you go, folks — or should I say volk — that’s the Muslim Ban Herr Donald promised. Let’s bracket off the fact that no terrorists — Islamic or otherwise — who have committed acts of terror in the USA are from these countries and that the president specifically AVOIDED banning people from any country with whom Trump Inc. does business. That’s to be expected. And why would facts like that matter to you, anyway? The thing that gets me — that sends the gamma radiation surging through Rebellious Raging Jim’s heart — is that 83% of the republican party appears happy about this ban; some are even pleasantly surprised. Well, what do you know, Republicans? Slap my thighs with your Mama’s hidden strap-on (it’s in that sealed plastic container under your parent’s bed right next to Dad’s bottle of blue pills. I’ll wait here while you go get it) and call me a fucking bucking bronco with two wangs! You really are totally irredeemable!

I grew up in a conservative Republican household. I believed in the ‘America of Ronald Reagan’ and in ‘Family Values,’ and I voted Republican until Newt Gingrich became the face of the party in 1994. A lot of my family members are still Republican, in fact, and I quit Facebook and Twitter in an attempt to shield them from Rebellious Raging Jim, but I just can’t do it anymore.

My simple response to the polling data is this: 83% of Republicans are unrepentant racists. There’s no way around it.

Charming Jim wants to teach you. He doesn’t really want to hurt you, but you know, Rebellious Raging Jim — The Real Jim Shady — is a little more concerned about human beings who are ACTUALLY being physically injured and killed, who are starving, who are driven from their homes every day in Syria and other war-torn parts of the globe. I’m concerned about a nation that dares call itself a ‘symbol of freedom,’ a ‘shining city on a hill,’ and then sends armed guards to round up and intimidate people because they come from a different part of the world or because they are — heavens no, mercy me — Muslim! Holy shit! The Muslims are coming! Get your children into your underground hidey holes. You’ve got to protect the red Earth of Tara from the oncoming hordes in their spooky, non-Western clothing!

Seriously, do you Republicans not know your twentieth-century history at all? Do you really think having white nationalists in the White House is a good or moral or even practical thing? I know the house is white — and you like your tighty-whities — but come on! Do you really like seeing xenophobes whip the nation into a toxic frenzy? Do you secretly enjoy yourselves when demagogues decry judges for using reason, when they decry the media for using facts, or when they attack those superpowered, monstrously ambitious academics and intellectuals who suggest that we all take a breath and think about the implications of our actions? SO, Let me ask the question one more time, as loud as I can. Here it goes: Oh, say can you see the unraveling of anything resembling democracy, democratic process, the balance of power, or human decency going on right in front of you?

Ok, so, clearly 83 % of you don’t see it. 83% of you are happy with the direction Trump is taking the country. What can I say?

Well, I can say that you’re The Racist Party. That’s what you have become — and that’s what I will continue to call you. The Republican Party is the Racist Party. If you don’t like being called racist, then stop supporting racism. You are the Party of David Duke and Richard Spencer and Donald Trump, and if you think you’re better than those people, if you think that you’re not like them, let me assure you of something: You’re not better until you make yourself better. You’re not different until you rid your party of its deep, abiding, and malignant commitments to intolerance, fascism, and racism. You are all Richard Spencer. You are all Donald Trump. Change it or at least be honest about it. Admit that you’re a big ‘ole cabal of racists.

We are living with a racist, fascistic regime heading our country. Oh what’s that you say? OH, Right! I forgot. You say that you guys have cooler GOP heads running the Senate and the House?

Do you mean those cooler heads in the Senate who just broke longtime Senate rules to make sure that the President gets all of the extremist nominees his decomposing, vampiric, pussy-grabbing, little heart desires? Yeah, those guys are great, too. Fuckin’ A. Well done.

You don’t believe in democracy. Stop saying you do. You don’t believe in the dream of an open, freedom-loving, inviting, generous America. You don’t believe in the city on the hill. You believe in America First. You believe that everyone else should strive to be like you, strive to be — and to behave — like white Americans, but you also secretly believe that no one else will ever really get there, that no one else will ever really be as good as you white Americans. So, to you 83% of the Republican party, Rebellious Raging Jim certainly has something to say: I don’t care about your tiny little racist feelings. I don’t care about your homes and your achievements. I don’t care about the objects and bank accounts you’ve put together to make a life for yourselves and your families. Frankly, I’m struggling to care about your well-being, at all. Why? Well, it’s simple. You have no moral ground to stand on. You’re powerful, you’re corrupt, and you’re painfully, blindingly hypocritical.

Oh, and one more thing: you’re certainly not followers of Christ. I know you THINK you are, but…as the great knuckle-dragging, numpty of white hope barked during one of the debates, “WRONG!”

When Jesus came aknockin’ on your door, you offered to round him up, you threatened him, and you wanted to deport his beaten, persecuted ass. What do I mean by that? Well, don’t you remember your Bible, yo? You love it like it’s money, but have you ever really internalized its words? Take a look at Matthew 25, baby. Let Jesus lay some sweet Jesus Truth on your brown-person hating, Muslim-fearing ass:

Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee hungered, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink? When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee? Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee? And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

Good job on that Christianity thing! You guys rock that Christian ethic shit like you’re a swimming pool orgy of wild, cocaine-addled Torquemadas! Well done! I applaud the way you use Jesus’s name but know him not. Impressive work, there. Let me know what Jesus says to you about how well you’ve done when you meet him. Ok? Oh, and don’t forget to tell him you were a proud, card-carrying member of the Racist Party.

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The Real Jim Shady

I am a pop-culture fanatic, a thinker who philosophizes with a big, scary hammer, and a master of profane erudition. When they go low, I go lower!