How Stalking Changed My Use of LinkedIn and Career Advancement
The Professional Challenges Domestic Violence and Stalking Victims Face
-The Tactical Victim-
It’s a Mindset, a New Way of Life 🔒
Read:
- Job Hacks for Stalking Victims,
if your escaping and need help applying to jobs safely (ie. Worries about: References, refferals and your new location being found)
Read this story from The Tactical Victim on Medium: https://medium.com/@TheTacticalVictim/essential-job-application-hacks-for-stalking-victims-safely-navigate-your-references-and-emergency-019a5bf2616a
Perspective Post
Some of the articles I write, are for the purpose of offering perspective into the life of the more extreme cases of Domestic Violence and stalking.
Mine happens to be one of them, as, the severity was so great, its hard to take in, over a period of hours..
These Perspective Posts will help you and others, understand WHY, its so hard, to “pick yourself up by the bootstraps”.
and get going again.
Here’s just one example
I spent years building up my LinkedIn profile.
I wrote articles, collaborated with others in my industry, and had a good number of recommendations from those I worked with.
I was also getting more and more work opportunities..
which took me years upon years to slowly build.
My work and effort was paying off.
I had old bosses, friends, co-workers, probably like you do.
I could put it on my resume with pride and joy.
I knew I would likely get the job over another candidate, because of my LinkedIn.
An Attempt on My Life
- Fast forward to me going to the police and filing a report.
- Going to the Domestic Violence shelter.
- My work was put on hold, as my life was put in danger.
I also learned, many of my accounts were being followed and monitored by this person.
They had a full time job, but had plenty of time on their hands.
and, even if they don’t, they MAY become Obsessed with you.
I have things I got to do..
They have have you, and only you, (or maybe others too)
To Obsess with.
To Follow.
To Mess with.
To Harm.
What else made things more difficult?
My Domestic violence counselor warned me about Spyware.
Spyware Evidence — Safety Net Project (techsafety.org)
“Dual-Use Applications and Tools That Can be Misused”
Here’s one clip from the above article:
“In addition to spyware applications that have a main purpose of remotely spying on someone, there are also applications that have legitimate purposes, but can be misused to access a device remotely or receive data from it.
Dual-use applications may be purposefully downloaded by the user and they may not even be aware the abusive person has remote access to their device data through it.”
It is something they (the abuser, stalker), can put into your phone, either because they have access to it, or, because they send you a malicious link.
How to Stay Safer:
-Don’t click on links sent to you by others, whenever possible.
-Sometimes, they are used to install viruses onto your device.
-Anti-virus software can help with this and some emails, VPN’s and other apps, can help you with this.
This is far from complete though.
-Turning “Off”, the “location” feature in your settings can help too.
My DV Counselor
I told them, I’d be fine, there was no way they had accessed my phone.
Well, they scared the shit out of me and I decided I would change every password for my email, FB, LinkedIn and so on and so forth.
I also got rid of my old phone too.
-I forgot to save, write or email, my lists of contacts, emails..of everyone one I knew.
I just saved a few.
Am I Stupid?
Given I was told, I didn’t have much time, I was in a rush and constant state of fear.
You don’t expect someone who has been normal, for years upon years, of their life, to change so drastically.
It starts gradually, do remember that.
Its easy to look and say: man, why didn’t you leave right away?
-How did you not know?
Well, its not that easy, quick or simple.
Also, everyone one's story is different, with complexities.
So, even I will say the same thing about others, as, we all see “the worst”, rather than the inch by inch progress, it went into.
Goodbye Linkedin
After I changed states, I had a new phone.
Months later, I signed into my old LinkedIn account.
I cried.
I was flooded with memories, and the same feelings I once had, about my career, my interests and all the ideas I once had.
Luckily, I screenshotted some of my recommendations, that I was most proud of.
I sent a few articles I wrote, to my email.
Then, I signed out, not thinking much of it, just glad I could get back in, whenever I wanted, and my years of life and work, didn’t go to waste.
I was wrong
The second time I tried signing in, my phone signed out.
It was a security measure, I had put in place, that I forgot about.
LinkedIn realized I was signing in from a different phone.
It saw this as “suspicious”.
I was never able to log in again.
All the articles I wrote, contacts I made, were lost.
Wait…that doesn’t “Add Up”, Right?
Thank you for being suspicious of me, again.
I’m used to it.
(Maybe you weren't)
We (those of us who deal with this stuff), are used to it.
My person, actually tried, and in some cases, successfully communicated with professional contacts I knew..
-Sending them messages about me, things like that.
What do I mean by that?
They would contact people in my LinkedIn and social network, make up stories, spread rumors (yes, like highschooler and just as, if not more malicious).
Also, I was scared.
I wasn’t sure who they had contacted and who they had not.
Also, if I created another LinkedIn, they would just find me again..
-They can see the city you’re in..where you work..
Getting Creative
-Unless of course, you lie, or because you “forgot”, to change the city..
-And, you changed your name (which creates alot of complications).
Block them you say?
-That is a good idea..
and, sometimes that will work.
In my case, I found out, they used their friends to do the work for them too.
I didn’t know yet, how they had turned numerous people against me, and had multiple people, looking me up.
Some I think, were told a very different story, and thought they were helping this person out and somehow, helping me.
Yes, they were very manipulative.
Either way, I had to stay off LinkedIn, for a Long Time.
When I Went Back On
When I finally went back on..
I had to do it very differently.
Same with my FB and other social media channels.
Follow me and or Subscribe to My Email List, if you want to stay up to date for my latest Security, Psychological and Tactical tips..
Thank you all for your support.
-The Tactical Victim-
It’s a Mindset, a New Way of Life 🔒
