“Women Don’t Like Short Men” is a Bad Excuse

Dan K
4 min readNov 19, 2018

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At 5’1”, I’m short even amongst short men. In middle school, male classmates bullied me about my height, picked me last for sports, and on a few occasions even tried to pick fights. To cope, I developed a thick skin for insults while honing my own ability to pinpoint other kids’ insecurities. I also learned to take a punch so I could throw one back.

By high school, everyone had matured. With the exception of good-natured ribbing from my friends, short jokes were a relic of the past. But with maturity came a new problem: girls.

Everybody knows women don’t like short men. They want a guy who’s at least 6 inches taller than them. They want a guy who won’t make them feel big in heels. They want a guy who’s tall, dark, and handsome.

Except that’s all a load of shit. “Women don’t like short men” is a sorry excuse used by insecure men who would rather blame women and genetics for their problems than figure out how to make themselves desirable.

Like me, for example. I felt incredibly self-conscious about my height for a long time. My resentment wasn’t focused specifically on women — but it was turned outwards. My learned defense mechanism of targeting other people’s weak points, which had served me so well in elementary school, became a major liability by high school. Anytime I met a new person, my first thought would be something mean––what were their flaws, their fears, their ticks––how could I turn the tables on someone who did absolutely nothing wrong? It affected my ability to make friends and pursue relationships. I felt like I was becoming a nasty, bitter person. Even worse than hating my body, I hated my personality.

Eventually, I realized that all the hatred built up inside me was only hurting one person — myself. If I ever wanted to be happy, I needed to change. And while I couldn’t change my height, I could change my personality.

It’s easy to face rejection and decide that the problem exists outside of yourself. Realize that this is a defense mechanism and an excuse to avoid the hard work and personal growth that will ultimately lead to success.

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Dan K

Writer & screenwriter, usually rocking a man bun.