Day Four

My best friend, Maria, and I, we’re two women that were looking for love in the wrong place.

It always come from yourself first. I’m not broken.

We broke off things with our past lover recently, it wasn’t intended to happen at the same time, it just happened. We live in different places, seeing each other for comfort, a sense of place, a tie with someone that understands your pain, it’s not easy.

But we’re ones to believe changing a habit simply takes time. Research says three months, so we’re sharing our story #72days

Day Four:

We have no more prompts after the third day.

I met with an old acquaintance of mine earlier today. He reminded me of everything in society I despise, but I’m sure he only meant well.

He must not have much opportunity to talk about his success story.

I haven’t seen him in a year maybe.

He was in the city for a meeting, and wanted to meet and film a video together.

The plan was to do some crazy shit around the city. Climb some walls, jump some stairs — maybe off a building.

His meeting dragged on an extra hour. What can you do?

I had work in less than an hour.

So we just chatted around the city.

“Oh. No more University?”

“Nope, I quit my program.”

“So no more university? What about your degree? How many semesters did you have left?”

“I probably still had like three left to go.”

“Well at least cost wise, I mean time wise, you left early.”

Homes, I can do my cost-benefit analysis very well, thank you very much.

“What do you want to do?”

“You mean right now? Walk a bit, catch up.”

“No, I mean with your life.”

“Oh man, I don’t know anymore. I just want to take a break right now, I’ve been asking that questing and coming up short too much lately.”

“So where are you at right now?”

“I do communications for a nonprofit, part time.”

“Come on Tammy, where’s that passion? What happened?”

“I need a break.”

“No, tell me what do you want to do? What happened to you? You always did crazy shit.”

Homes, I need a break.

“I still do want to change minds, inspire people.”

“You should go into education. What are you doing media for?”

“It’s easy and pays the bills for me to live in this city. Just try something.”

“Come on really, what do you want to do?”

“Inspire people.”

“Yeah, you’re amazing at that. Look at what you did at your org. It’s amazing.”

“I’ve been in touch with the alumni association here too, just a hard crowd to work with.”

“Yeah I know, I’m trying to set up a group in Beijing for my university too.”

He continues onto give me the run down on how to get things started. And I begin to zone out. By the time I realize, the conversation goes into how he’s cutting deals for is company — the negotiator.

“That’s pretty great.”

“What are you plans then, for now?”

“Take a break mainly. Someone asked to start a magazine with me, but the team’s not there. Have been wondering if I should go back to the States to help people organize better in my home.”

“You know, the key is, Tammy, is to look at where your niche is. Like me, that’s how I got into where I’m going today. When I was in the States, I knew my competition wasn’t with the other American students. And when I came back to China I was behind because I didn’t attend school here. So I knew I had to do things in between. What I’m saying is, it’s such a waste for you to go back to America right now, you know especially with Trump.”

You don’t understand Homes.

“You can speak Chinese well and read it even better. I think the best place to make a big impact now is in China’s second and third tier cities.”

By the this time we’ve looped back to where our walk started.

“Yeah, I can see that. Thanks for all the advice. I’m not worried about this right now. I’m just looking forward to my vacation right now. I can’t think.”

We get in a car and start driving.

“Yeah taking a break is good. I do calligraphy now. It really gets me to slow down. But don’t take too long of a break. You’re going to lose sight of your passion. You’re young, don’t let that passion go to waste.”

“Yeah, I just want to run.”

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