Do you ever have a moment when all of a sudden everything seems to stop. You look up from what you’re doing and you have no idea how you got here. How a whole day has passed you by and you barely even moved to pee. It’s not like this was a lazy day, spent on the couch with a bag of gluten free chocolate chip cookies (which I do not eat because I’m gluten-free, which I’m not, it’s purely because I am a psychopath and I think gluten-free cookies taste better than gluten infused cookies for some strange reason.) Anyways, I spent my day working on projects for clients. Looking back now at almost 1am I feel like I didn’t even get much done. So what the hell did I do all day?

I guess I should give myself more credit. I tend to walk, well I guess it’s more of a burdened haul, since I tend to put an inordinate amount of pressure on myself. Which I will admit is delicately placed on my shoulders by none other than yours truly. So what just happened?

I had a moment. At 1am.

A moment where I realized how big the world is and how small I feel. A moment where I realized that even if I sit behind a computer all day the sun still rises and sets. The world isn’t waiting for me…So why am I waiting for the world?

Why am I waiting? I don’t know. Am I waiting for someone to tell me what to do? Am I waiting because tomorrow I will somehow be smarter and wiser and then I will know what to do? Am I waiting because I am afraid? Am I…

Yeah… probably. No. Stop. Don’t hide behind probably(s) and maybe(s). Because deep down you know.


And that’s okay.

I’m not really sure what to say here, because I’m still trying to figure myself out and you know what that’s okay.