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It’s only Twitter … what could happen?

Tim Berry
Tim Berry
Oct 25, 2016 · 2 min read

(Important: the following is 100% fiction. This is entirely imagined.)

The scene is an obscenely luxurious office with a gorgeous view from somewhere in midtown Manhattan. Walls are gold. The furniture, including desks, chairs, couches, is all decorated with various themes of gold. It’s March, 2009.

Meredith, a 50-something woman dressed in impeccable business costume, shakes her head, showing doubt. She’s talking with a younger woman, Melanie, also well dressed, probably — one can tell from their body language — somebody lower than her on the pecking order. “But Twitter?” she asks.

“I know,” Melanie answers, shaking her head, her expression showing doubt, contemplating what she thinks might be a bad idea. “But he’s asking now and then, and I don’t feel like I have any reason not to just help him and show him how.”

“But who would do the tweeting? Does it fit the communications budget? What would be the benefit?” That was Meredith posing a string of loosely connected questions in random order. Her face looked skeptical.

“He says he wants to. He says it would be a great way to add to his brand.” Meredith frowned in response. Melanie went on. “And you and I both know social media matters, more and more. So does he. He wants to be up to date, forward thinking.” She puckers her face, and imitates their boss’s expressions. “After all, I’m a great communicator. I do it better than anybody.”

Meredith chuckles. “Ok, I suppose,” she adds. “Let’s try it.” She seems reluctant, but finishes, “go ahead and set up an account. Let’s see how it goes.”

A couple hours later, Meredith takes a phone call from Melanie. “Somebody else already has his name as a handle,” she says.

“Bummer. So do we give it up …” (she hopes) “… or what?”

“I think I have a quick solution. James Woods is @realjameswoods. Hugh Jackman is @realhughjackman.”

“Ok,” Meredith says, “set him up in Twitter. But set up a process to tweet for him, control the message, keep it all within our branding.”

“Sure,” Melanie responds. “I’ll do it. I’ll set up the handle @realdonaldtrump. After all, it’s only Twitter. What could happen?”

Tim Berry

Written by

Tim Berry

Founder of Palo Alto Software. Entrepreneur, blogger, believes in lean business planning. Stanford MBA. Father of 5, married 48 years.