December 18th 2012

It is a nice evening. I just came back from my parents’ apartment. We celebrated their 18th wedding anniversary. Time flies so quickly! I am sipping on my glass of Crozes-Hermitage while listening to Brahms’s piano concerto no. 1 in D minor interpreted by Clifford Curzon and thinking of the woman I love: M.E.K.

That woman came to me when I was 17 years (she was 17 too), and she talked to me because she liked the photographs I did at this time.

— I like your photography a lot! They are pretty
 — Thank you

At that time I did not understand that she could, more than anyone, feel the emotions I captured in my photography — at that time, I was a foolish little boy trying to create an existence out of lies. I was not able to understand anything about my environment whatsoever.

April 17th 2010, it was the 18th birthday of my best friend G.J.W, and during that night, I met M.E.K for the first time. She was wearing a white dress with black spots. She was charming and cute. However, she was terribly annoying with her great smile and extroverted attitude. For some reason, I could not put it with her. Somehow, she knew something was not good in me and she tried to really stick with me to know more about me. Of course she never could — I was an asshole.

Time passed and I rarely saw her again. We spoke only via chat online and our subject of conversation would vary from Japanese rock music, photography, to porn. She was very open and creative about sex. It was great fun to talk to her but she always tried to know more about me which was a definite no. Time passed by, we did not met until she went to Reunion Island for a classical music concert. When she came back, she wanted to give me chocolate and she bought too much in the Sir Seewoosagur Ramgoolam International Airport’s duty free shop. I always wondered why people buy chocolate when they come back from foreign country.

M.E.K is a musician, a violinist. I knew she loved music but never heard her play. In 2011, she told me to come to her rehearsals at some certain church to take some pictures — I stopped photography for a moment at that time and she wanted me to shoot again. I was not compelled to do so. I do not remember exactly why. Maybe the wine is not helping.

In 2012, the only interaction M.E.K and I had was whenever she would like a shared link about classical music. I loved to listen to Albinoni’s Adagio in G minor. During the end of November, she contacted me again to take pictures of a concert in the Anglican church in Port Louis — St James Church. I accepted because I was done with High School and I had nothing else to do. Photographing musicians could be nice. G.J.W was also invited and he would help me cover important angles of the concert.

That night was a special night. As G.J.W and I entered the church, I asked him, “where is M.E.K?”

— Dude, she is right in front of us, next to that tall girl
 — What? No way!

I could not recognise her at all that night. It was not the dress nor the amazing shoes she was wearing. Her whole being changed. That night was the first classical music concert I have ever assisted and photographed. The atmosphere was phenomenal. I was very inspired to take photographs of people I felt was beautiful. There was not a whole not… M.E.K was playing in the second violin section. I spent most of my time photographing her more than anything else. She attracted me and I felt overwhelmed by her beauty and the music they were producing.

Among the pieces, the string ensemble played Tchaikovsky’s Serenade for Strings in C minor. Even today, I am not sure what happened. It was the first time I heard the piece and for some reason, I felt like I knew the piece by heart. I was singing the upcoming notes as they were playing them. I enjoyed thoroughly the music and even stopped taking pictures. As the concert was over, M.E.K came to my best friend and I to thank us for our presence and she was looking forward to our pictures. G.J.W and I then left the St James Church. “I think I like M.E.K now,” I told him while hopping in our taxi.

— What?, he said.

As from that night, I knew something happened. I fell in love. First time of my life I was attracted to somebody and was genuinely intrigued.

January 2013, 00:00 am, I told her I love her and she told me “you finally said it. I love you too.”

Tonight, I am alone sipping on my glass of red wine while listening to the last movement of Brahms’s piano concerto in D minor. I miss her a lot… I feel that I have to go through something else now. I am here, while listening to the finale of the concerto — the amazing trills done by Curzon’s magical fingers and the superb horns singing — telling her that I always loved her and always will.

I am here… and that woman told me: “I did not want to be reincarnated in this world again.”

Something new is coming… And now Hilary Hahn is performing Stravinsky’s violin concerto. The Capriccio is dazzling.

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