I’m not being a scrooge. Promise.

Dear friends, family, and well-wishers from our community,

I know, I know. You want to shower my kids with gifts every chance you get, and the holidays provide the perfect chance to spoil the heck out of them.

I know you want to send them mountains of presents, but I have to ask that you limit yourself to one or two gifts for each child.

And I ask you this, because I made the same mistake with two of my kids after we were granted custody of them.

My youngest and middle kiddos are my step-children, and my husband and I got custody of them in 2013. …

Recently on Quora, a user asked the following question: “What are the two types of Reactive Attachment Disorder?” I answered with the following explanation of Reactive Attachment Disorder and Disinhibited Social Engagement Disorder.

Prior to the DSM-V, there were two types of reactive attachment disorder listed in the manual (Reactive Attachment Disorder — Inhibited Type and Reactive Attachment Disorder — Disinhibited Type). They’re now broken up into two separate diagnoses (Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and Disinhibited Social Engagement Disorder (DSED)).

In RAD, the kiddo is more likely to withdraw and blatantly refuse to attach to her caregivers. A child who has this diagnosis does not seek comfort from adults when hurt or upset, exhibits a low response when comforted by caregivers, has a low positive affect and often looks sad, irritated or fearful when interacting with caregivers during routine or even enjoyable interactions with adults. …

Someone asked a question on Quora the other day about attachment styles and attachment disorders, wondering if an anxious-avoidant attachment style meant the same thing as Reactive Attachment Disorder.

Those of you raising kids with attachment problems or who are otherwise firmly entrenched in the world of attachment-trauma probably know everything I’m about to say, but those unfamiliar may need a primer on these terms.

So, without further ado…

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Stable in relationships, secure attachment develops in kids whose experiences have taught them it’s safe to trust their parents and, later, other adults in charge (thought process: “If I cry, someone will know what I need to feel better and give it to me.”). …


Trauma Mama S

Transcriptionist, wife, mother, occasional blogger. My goal? To spread awareness about the effects of early-childhood trauma.

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