A Candle Loses Nothing by Lighting Another Candle
Article by Lucy West
I absolutely love this quote but my teenage years and even early twenties saw me thinking very differently to how I do now. I spent hours comparing myself to others, a lot of the time in secret competition with friends and other classmates, wanting to look the best; achieve the most and be the most popular. Unfortunately, I was never any of these so I spent years feeling like I never quite made the grade. I would secretly feel almost excited when we started to gossip about someone, (especially the prettiest or most popular girls in the school), while they were being pulled down I didn’t seem nearly so bad in my own eyes; if I found out someone I envied was falling apart/had trouble at home/had been dumped by their boyfriend or friends it made me feel sad for them but I also felt I was doing ok…for now! L
If we live like this though it can all change in a moment. If they are gossiping about her today, they may be gossiping about you tomorrow and what does that do? It breeds insecurity, anger or mistrust, it breeds all kinds of nastiness that you could really do without while navigating this crazy beautiful life!
When my friends and people around me are looked after, when I’ve spoken encouraging words into their lives, when I’ve been there for them or given them a gift when they’ve needed it a rest, a break from the hardness of life it’s then that I’ve seen them thrive and you know what? When someone near you thrives, you reap all the benefits…you win! This is what I believe winning in life is about, it’s not about getting the best stuff, being at the top of your game while watching others fall around you. It’s great to strive to be the best we can be, but that shouldn’t control us. Winning is about seeing those around you come to life in a few sentences, it’s about seeing the shock then delayed joy on a strangers faces when you give them a big fat smile! Winning is about bringing light and rest to people’s lives through simple kindness, not negativity or dullness. The Bible puts it beautifully… Galatians 6:7 ‘A man reaps what he sows’ when we sow our light, we reap huge benefits!
I wonder who we can come alongside to encourage, build up, teach or train? Who can we come alongside and give them a moment or an afternoon of our precious time? Sometimes it only takes a short conversation, a text, a moment of understanding, a hug, a listening ear and a confirmation that they are, in fact, not alone…a candle loses nothing by lightning another candle!
I know the reality, life can be both annoying or frustrating, and this can make it incredibly difficult to shine at times. But I dare you. Who has ever brought another person joy in whatever way and regretted that time or gift they gave, maybe some have, but I refuse to be one of those people. I refuse to see only the bad in this world. I pray for the bad, I petition God with tears running down my face BECAUSE I believe in the good so much. The truth is, I would MUCH prefer to walk around my world lighting other candles just in the every day of life. The more candles I light, the more their lights will go out and shine, and the more light there is in this dark world the more joy, freedom and kindness repaid we will see! As I light other candles around me the more I will see those candles leading Women into freedom from eating disorders. Mothers waiting for their promises comforted and comforting others in their pain. As I light the candles around me I will see teenagers listened to, young people given respect and a voice, old people looked after, refugees respected, clothed, provided for and loved. As we love we then light their candle and the process begins again with someone new. What then can we lose from lighting other candles around us? My heart tells me ‘nothing at all’.
Lucy means ‘light’ and I guess I’ve taken that as my life assignment!! I am someone who unashamedly celebrates people of all walks, colours, situations and ages. My biggest passions in life are Jesus, my husband Lindz and gorgeous little 5 year old son! The rest of my life is filled with friends, photography, book writing, song writing, singing, the outdoors, exercise, clean eating (when I can stay away from cake haha!) and generally trying to be Pinterest perfect but often failing terribly! I have though learned that this is fine, I don’t have to be perfect…or even any good at everything, but it is however good to be kind, courageous and passionate always!
