The Weight of Low Expectations

11 am Saturday. Getting my roots dyed and talking with Caucasian friends from high school about #BlackLivesMatter on Facebook. Pulling my comment from there into a more public forum.

Yeah, I think we fundamentally disagree about the “equality” here. You can point out that because there are no laws prohibiting “black” people from something that they have equal access, etc, but the absence of prohibition doesn’t imply the presence of equality.

I have felt this more and more as I’ve moved up in a career path that’s predominately male. There’s no law that says a woman can’t do my job, and there are TONS of organizations to assist women in tech, but that doesn’t mean it’s as easy for me to advance my career. Women as still perceived as less capable in leadership roles, are more often interrupted, spoken over, passed over, discarded, and disrespected. We can fight to be heard, but in doing so, we get labeled as aggressive, authoritarian, bossy, unkind, and unfit for career advancement.

I feel so often that my hands are tied. I have to move in subtle ways, not upsetting the cultural norms with too much drama. Building alliances where I can. It’s exhausting. Every day.

And all this because my minority is perceived as less capable. That’s it! I can’t imagine how steep the incline for social equality when your minority is perceived as fundamentally lazy, malicious, or evil.

There is no higher compliment than great expectations, and no heavier shackle than low ones.