All aboard the Bandwagon: #IceBucketChallenge
For those not wanting a read, here is a link to 11 girls in Bikini’s throwing ice over themselves, only two of whom mention donating.
This morning I got up and showered. Then I filled a kettle up and boiled it for a single cup of tea. Then I had a glass of water whilst I contemplated how I might waste further water throughout the day. Thankfully, the ice bucket challenge is constantly bombarding my face and after long deliberation over whether it’s narcissistic or good willed, I’ve concluded that it isn’t such a bad thing to be both — and hell, I’d like to think I’m as arrogant and charitable as anyone. The last water bill I received was charged at around £60 per unit, which is 13 baths apparently. I’d say one bucket might equate to a fifth of a bath at most, meaning I only need donate £1.01p to make up for wastage. Unlike in California where most of the real famous people live, there is no drought in Wales… unsurprisingly. Hopefully that alleviates some guilt.
The “ALS Ice Bucket Challenge” though has begun to sound more like something that occurs during a basketball half-time show than something invented to increase awareness about a lesser known disease. Some of us aren’t even mentioning charity anymore in our challenges and it’s gotten more ‘nek-nominate’ than ‘look at this horrendously debilitating and incurable disease affecting millions: let’s do something about it’.
Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis or Motor Neurone Disease affects around 7 in every 100,000 of us; which may not seem like a lot, but that still equates to almost half a million of us. So far the MNDA in the UK has raised over £4.5 million and ALS in the US has raised over $15 million. That’s a lot of money and the fact that both ALS and MNDA are endorsing the challenges should make any second-guesser put down their stiff upper lip and pick up a fucking bucket. If you want to know what this actually means, Anthony Carbajal’s moving ice bucket challenge will make you stop whining about how your news feed is just people covering themselves in ice instead of mindless status updates and upworthy articles about Miley Cyrus. This is probably the most money raised in the shortest amount of time for the disease ever. However, whilst that is good going, second richest man in the world Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg who Forbes listed yesterday as $385.1M better off just TODAY than he was yesterday and Charlie Sheen who made $1,000,000 per episode of Two & A Half Men have all contributed, along with countless other 1%ers. Given the fact that the UK raised £31.1 million in one night for Children in Need last year, couldn’t we be doing better? (Matt Damon, Justin Timberlake, David Beckham and Kylie Minogue > McBusted and Terry Wogan… just saying).
I am sadly not a billionaire. I don’t even have a single million, but I have donated. Not just to MDNA (Text ICED55 £5 to 70070) but also to Help For Heroes, as I met a guy in work walking 8000 miles around the entirety of Great Britain, (including Scotland before she buggers off). He had a free meal on the restaurant and he can have my bloody tips from that night too.
I’ve nominated my sister because if she didn't feel anything through our innate twin mind-link, then she needs to. You have really as long as you fucking like, and the knowledge that you’ve put your money where your narcissism is will be enough for me.