The past is done and over with and can’t be changed and represents regret, the future is not ours yet and represents fear, and the present is the only place where real personal change can be implemented. And yet we spend most of our time thinking about the past and the future – because there’s no concrete commitment required to think about those places – nothing we have to make good on today. Just regrets and promises.
Stay in the here and now and enjoy your partner. Change yourself, adjust your own behavior, stop being miserable about things you can’t control, and she’ll be with you because she wants to be and because you are intellectually attractive and emotionally well put together.