Happiness applied

There are thousands of manuals towards happiness. Some are horrible, some decent, a few inspiring. Can someone please summarize the various how-tos into an approach that makes sense? Without incense sticks esoteric or an eccentric yes-you-can garble? Yup. You’re welcome.

Photo by Lidya Nada on Unsplash

Why do manuals for happiness exist?

Well, not only did our expectations increase, but maybe also the fast joy-fix (Amazon, Instagram, Netflix…) has become too easy, has worn off and made us dependent. Psychologists call this habituation. Somehow, that fix always felt hollow, anyway. Never mind, a quick shopping spree and we’ll immediately feel better 👜 very briefly at least.

We want convenience, and not ancient philosophers telling us that lasting happiness only comes through effort. We want to buy a feeling of Flow on Amazon and not having to work in that narrow corridor between fear of overburden and boredom. We seek the shortest way to happiness. And for that we want manuals. Maybe yoga. Maybe meditation. But the fast and easy way.

Searching…

A combined approach

zentor model for a fulfilling life

In my understanding a life is fulfilling, if it is defined by recurring moments of joy and flow. The three main sources for these moments are Purpose, Engagement, and People:
We find purpose in doing things that extend beyond ourselves and which are aligned to our values (cognitive layer).
Being social animals, we seek appreciation and positive feedback from people that are important to us (social & individual layer).
We feel engagement for activities we enjoy and are good at (emotional layer). Passion or engagement respectively also delivers the vital energy for everything we do.
The bases for being able to sustainably use the three sources are on one hand personal factors such as one’s identity, will, skill and good physical health and on the other hand a well-functioning society in line with the environment and nature — the two pillars in the model.

A fulfilling life, according to this view, also cannot be a state, but rather an ongoing process. Also, happiness cannot be delivered on a silver platter, but requires a pro-active shaping of our path in life. Consquently, the personal factors are central to be able to apply this model in practice:
- A good understanding of one’s identity and character, including strenghts and value
- The will, courage and readiness to change
- Skills to manage change and find a path towards a fulfilling life
- Good physical health through enough sleep, exercise and nutrition.

These factors enables us to repeatedly access the key sources of happiness in order to find moments of joy and flow, and to integrate these into a fulfilling life. And each of these personal factors can be trained and strengthened through various techniques.

Btw: We are using the combined model also at zentor to develop a digital mentor for a fulfilling life. If you’d like to know more about our “purpose platform” or test an initial application of the model we invite you to stop by at www.zentor.me.

And now for all of you who would like to get one level deeper: Here’s a short and very simplified description of the various approaches which I found useful.


Approaches from the domain of psychology

Illustration: https://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/learn

His PERMA Model towards happiness is one of the scientifically and empirically more sound ones and consists of the following elements (very simplified):
- Positive Emotions (well-dosed experiences of pleasures & joys)
- Engagement (exercising your strengths to find flow)
- Relationships (appreciation from and for others we care about)
- Meaning (a deeper sense of purpose, transcending beyond us)
- Accomplishment (achieving success through effort)

A simplified illustration for Csíkszentmihályi’s concept of flow

Almost equally important in the realm of happiness in psychology is Mihály Csíkszentmihályi, who first researched the concept of flow — describing a mental state in which a person performing an activity is fully immersed in a feeling of energized focus, full involvement, and complete absorption in said activity. Very simplified, flow can be experienced in the space between boredom and anxiety, i.e. when one’s skill level meets the challenge level of an activity. Thus, not only the task itself is relevant for finding a state of flow, but also its difficulty and one’s skills to execute it is involved.

A bit older, but still relevant is Maslow’s hierarchy pyramid of needs, which aims to describe the levels of human growth. In this model, fulfilling basic needs (physiologic & safety needs) is followed by fulfilling psychological needs (social belonging & self-esteem) and lastly by self-actualisation. This last level comes closest to what we would term happiness and describes how to develop one’s full potential, to achieve that which nature has endowed us to be able to achieve. In a later revision of the pyramid, another level was added on top of the model called transcendence, i.e. giving oneself up to a higher outside goal and the search for a god/deity or Universal Good, driven by the desire to reach the infinite.

Philosophical approaches

More practically oriented approaches

The 3P approach has been applied and proven helpful in economical context (e.g. for leadership or in marketing) as well as in life planning.

An interesting approach for the processof finding a fulfilling life is Design Thinking. The chairs of Stanford’s Product Design Programme, Bill Burnett and Dave Evans, wanted to help their students with their career choices and decided to combine insights from positive psychology with techniques from design schools. And it proved to be very effective. In their approach called Designing Your Life, they propose to quit pursuing a lofty distant goal and instead suggest defining a few basic values, finding small activities you know you enjoy, and developing new opportunities for job & life through creative techniques — and most importantly, try them out via rapid prototyping.

Approaches from Far East

In Japan, the concept of Ikigai (roughly „that which is worth living“), seems to be quite prominent. It consists of the intersection of four separate domains: What you are good at, what you love, what the world needs, and what you can be paid for.

Illustration from https://www.improvisedlife.com/2018/02/26/ikigai/

A longitudinal study published in 2008 (Ohsaki Study) found a prolonged life expectancy for people who found their Ikigai.

Zen, a form of Buddhism which developed in the 5. century in China, consciously abstains from sage wisdom and religious doctrine. Zen means to live life in its entirety — without attempting to understand it through reason. It focuses on one’s experiences and actions in the Here & Now and aims to silence the (ruthlessly active and) self-centred mind. Zen practice is to meditate and concentrate on the presence. You can reach the level of enlightenment (or fulfilment) by truly experiencing the moment and giving up yourself and your ego, to realize you are one with everything else and connected with all.

According to the studies of the Chinese philosopher Confucius, mankind finds fulfillment through life-long learning. His humanistic ideal was that of a righteous, ethical being — quite similar to the Greek philosophers. Righteousness is linked to the core virtues of seriousness, generosity, sincerity, diligence and kindness — and the means to reach a virtuous life is through the cultivation of knowledge.


End Note

If you’re interested in the topic, and want to engage in the discussion or learn more I invite you to write a comment below or check us out directly: With zentor, we are continuously developing the combined model further — based on psychological insights, scientific research, and digital solutions — aiming to provide as many people as possible with a digital mentor on the path towards a fulfilling life. You can find us at www.zentor.me.

Valentin Schellhaas

Written by

Founder of zentor.me, PhD in Psychology; Former Managing Director Experteer, CMO Westwing, Manager Bain & Co